


Another Day

by NaiaRequel



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Action/Adventure, M/M, Mass Murder, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Romance, cursing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2018-08-31 03:04:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 29,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8561164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaiaRequel/pseuds/NaiaRequel
Summary: Pardoned of his war crimes against his will but wanted dead by many, Seifer Almasy retreats into the wilderness to restart his life. When his long-time rival suddenly shows up in his life once again, Seifer finds himself pulled back into a world he tried to leave behind, complete with bloodshed, betrayal, and a hope for a dream he thought long dead.





	1. Frostfall

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't my first SxS fic, but it is the first I've put on AO3. To be completely honest, I'm not sure where this fic is going...I wrote this with a vague idea of plotline, and I'm just going to roll with it. It's sort of exciting, actually...writing without a detailed outline. So if you're joining me on this adventure, welcome! :) And I hope you enjoy the ride.

 

It was bitter cold out, and Seifer liked it.

 

Standing among the tall pines, surrounded by silence, Seifer focused on what he felt: the chill biting into his skin, the brief sensation of warmth as his breath puffed out, momentarily visible in the frigid air...the odd heaviness of the quiet glade. It was so different from the sound of Balamb-- the crashing of the waves in the distance, the screaming of the gulls, the sound of boats docked in the harbor moving on the waves-- it was a difference he liked. A difference he _needed_.

 

He had ran here, to this place. Always running. Running from Garden, running to a Sorceress, running from death, from his friends...and here he was. Seifer tilted his face up, gazing at the expanse of the evening sky beyond the tops of the trees. _Maybe here I can finally stop running._

 

Frostfall was a small town southeast of what used to be Trabia Garden. Halfway up a mountain and surrounded by woods, it wasn't the most easily accessible place to reach and was thus not well known by the outside world. It had a population of about two hundred people. It was a place his fourteen year-old self wouldn't have enjoyed-- a place of quiet, reserved townsfolk with very little to do entertainment-wise. Now, it was the exact kind of place he needed to be.

 

Of course, his tastes had changed as well. He'd seen the world-- he'd helped burn parts of it. It wasn't the world that he needed to see anymore.

 

The villagers had naturally been weary of him at first. Not because he had a past as a power-hungry Sorceress's Knight bent on world domination, however, but simply because he was a stranger in a small town where everyone knew everyone. That wasn't to say that they didn't know who he was...some did. Those that did looked past it because of all the help Seifer provided the town with. Those that didn't grew accustom to his presence and eventually grew to accept him as a member of the town. It was more than he had hoped for.

 

* * *

 

 

By the time Seifer got back to town, the stars were already on their way out into the darkened sky. Smoke rose from several chimneys, including the one attached to the Nightingale Inn. Seifer's stomach rumbled loudly at the thought of the fresh apple stew that was undoubtedly waiting for him inside. Walking around to the back entrance that led to the kitchen, he quickly dropped the deer he'd been carrying on his shoulders and opened the door, poking his head in.

 

“Hey Dolly, I'm leaving the deer back here! I'll skin and clean it up after I eat!”

 

There was the sound of some pots being slammed down, and then a middle-aged woman with blue eyes and mousy hair poked her head around the corner, frowning upon seeing Seifer.

 

“Hyne almighty boy, get in here and dry off before you catch a cold! I don't know why you _insist_ upon wearing that thin coat of yours out in the snow-” Seifer laughed as the woman continued her tirade. “Go sit in front of the fire and wrap yourself in this-” A blanket made impact with his face. “-and I'll be out with some supper for you in a minute! Children these days...”

 

Resisting the urge to point out that he was twenty-two years old and not a child (he knew it wouldn't change the woman's opinion anyway), Seifer did as he was told and walked through the kitchen, out into the dining area, plopping down into the chair nearest to the fire.

 

Dolly Hemmerfield was the closest Seifer came to having a motherly figure in his life, other than Matron. Widowed at sixty years old, she now ran the Nightingale Inn with only her daughter, Anna, for help. Before Seifer had built his house, Dolly had taken him in at the inn, treating him as the son she'd never had. Although he had now moved out, Seifer still helped her with what he could-- firewood, hunting, (rarely, but sometimes) cooking. There weren't many visitors to Frostfall. There would occasionally be travelers from nearby villages staying a couple days for hunting or fishing at the nearby river, but that was about it. The inn got most of its business from the villagers of the town itself-- Dolly's cooking was extremely liked by the townsfolk, the main hall was warm and welcoming, and Anna drew much attention from the younger male villagers.

 

Dolly quickly put a steaming hot bowl in front of Seifer and hurried back into the kitchen, muttering under her breath about needing to get bread out of the oven. As Seifer dug into his dinner, footsteps came from above as Anna descended the stairs into the dining area. Spotting Seifer's back, she ran over and threw her arms around his neck.

 

“Seifer, you're back!” Seifer rolled his eyes, but smiled genuinely. Anna was as close to being his sister as one could get.

 

“Every time you say that it sounds like you _don't_ expect me to come back; I'm a grown boy, I can handle myself in the wilderness you know.” Anna pouted.

 

“I know that! It just gets boring here without you.” Releasing him from her grip, Anna sat down in the seat across from him, brushing her red bangs out of her eyes.

 

Seifer raised an eyebrow. “...so I guess I don't need to ask if anything happened in town today?”

 

Anna shook her head. “Other than Fredric slipping on ice and fracturing his hip this morning outside the school building, nothing out of the norm has happened.” Seifer winced. Fredric was the oldest resident of Frostfall, and falling on your hip at age eight-two could mean not being able to walk again.

 

Anna leaned forward. “How was hunting?” Seifer shrugged.

 

“Mostly deer out. Thought I heard a bear at one point, but never came across it.” Anna looked him up and down in a way Seifer knew was more concerned than sexual.

 

“...nothing else out there?”

 

She was of course asking about Seifer's secret side-job: protecting the village from the monsters that remained from the lunar cry. The only people in town that knew about it were Anna, the mayor, and Rauld, the city lumberjack.

 

He shook his head. “Nothing else.” She seemed to perk up, and as she opened her mouth to say something, she was interrupted by Dolly yelling for her. Jumping up, she waved to Seifer and hurried off to help. Seifer turned his attention back to his soup.

 

* * *

 

 

Seifer awoke suddenly from the sound of pounding fists on his front door. Without hesitation, he grabbed Hyperion, looking over at the clock as he threw a coat on quickly.

_4:30am._

_Why the **hell** is someone banging on my door? _

Stomping down the stairs, pausing only to place one hand on Hyperion's grip, he unbolted and unlocked the door, throwing it open, ready to practically breathe fire on whoever thought it was a brilliant idea to interrupt his sleep.

 

The mayor stood at his doorstep, wincing at the look Seifer had opened the door with, his fist frozen in mid air preparing to knock again. Perceiving the troubled look in the man's eyes, Seifer calmed his expression, though he continued to frown darkly.

 

“Creed, what's going on?” The mayor's eyes narrowed on the scar running between Seifer's eyes.

_“_ You'd better come with me son. Something has happened.” Seifer wanted to demand more detail, but at the same time, Mayor Creed rarely acted so serious. Turning around, he quickly locked his door and looked over at the other man.

 

“Alright, after you.”

 

The village was silent as they made their way down the street. Something about the silence felt different...weighted, almost. As they walked up the pathway to the Doctor's office, Seifer frowned, brows furrowed. __Maybe Fredric's health took a turn for the worse? Why would the mayor grab me for that though?_ _

The Doctor opened the door for them, looking grave. “Good, you're here. Follow me.” He led the two of them to a closed door.

 

“Rauld found him while he was doing his rounds. He was pretty torn up; monsters from the looks of it. Saw the mark on his face and thought maybe you know him.”

 

Seifer's heart stopped, breath caught in his throat, as the door opened and his eyes landed on the sleeping face of Squall Leonhart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Awake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It just keeps coming...but story-wise, it's becoming a little clearer where it's going.

 

“ _It has been determined and agreed upon by the ruling parties that Sorceress's Knight, Seifer Almasy, was under the direct control of Sorceress Ultimacia's magic, and is therefore pardoned of war crimes he committed under her power.”_

 

_...what? No!_

 

“ _You're out of your minds! I did it! All of it! It wasn't her-- it was me! I was in control!”_

 

_The lights in the conference room were blinding, making most of the people in the audience appear as shadows, but unintentionally his eyes connected with crystal blue ones. Eyes he knew all too well. Knowing who was there, watching him, Seifer reigned in his emotion-- tried to control the panic in his veins. Surely they had made a mistake..._

 

* * *

 

The last time he had seen his rival had been his trial; what he'd thought would be his last day living. He'd only caught a brief glimpse at that time, and he'd thought it'd be his last-- had planned on it being his last. But now here he was, still managing to look so peaceful in his sleep despite how much of his body was covered in bandages and blood. He could tell he was starting to shake as reality started to settle in.

 

“...is he going to be okay Doc?”

 

The doctor, Henry, stepped forward. “Most of the exterior wounds I was able to close up easily enough, though he may have some scarring on his arms and chest-- the claw marks were deep. He has a fractured rib, however, and he seems to be somewhat more resistant to magic than most. But what I'm worried about most, is his body temperature.”

 

Taking the candle handed to him from the doctor, Seifer walked over to Squall's bedside, bending down to peer at his sleeping face, eyes widening upon seeing the blue shade of his lips. Pulling his glove off his right hand with his teeth, Seifer reached down, placing it on his rival's forehead.

 

He ripped it back as icy pain quickly began to numb it. Frowning but without looking back, he asked,

 

“...when Rauld found him, was there anything odd about the area?”

 

Creed nodded, also stepping closer to the bedside. “It was almost as if a blizzard had blown through the glade...icicles hanging off the trees, ice on the ground like glass...”

 

_Shiva._

 

The ice-bitch, as Seifer not so fondly called her, must have ended up having to protect Squall. His temperature was probably residue from her power. Seifer turned to look at the two men.

 

“I can help him. Would you mind leaving, for now?” Creed and Henry exchanged glances, then Henry nodded.

 

“I'll be down the hall if you need me.” Seifer nodded.

 

“Thanks.” The two left, the door shutting quietly behind them, leaving Seifer and Squall's freezing body in the stillness.

 

Because he'd run from Garden without prior warning, Seifer had left with Ifirit still junctioned. After the war, he'd seen no reason to unjunction-- if anything, he had more than enough memories he wouldn't mind feeding to the fire demon in return for some extra safety.

 

“...we _can_ fix this, right?”

 

He felt a blazing warmth shoot through his body as a deep voice resounded in his head.

 

“ _It could have been far worse than this. It would appear that Shiva was running low on strength herself.”_ Seifer frowned, brows furrowing.

 

“...Squall is better than this. The _Ice Bitch_ is better than this. How could this have happened?”

 

He could sense Ifrit shaking his head. _“Place your hands on him.”_

 

Reaching down, Seifer placed one hand on Squall's chest, where he could feel a faint heartbeat, and one hand on his forehead, thumb tracing along the scar Seifer had left on him years ago. The warmth that had built up within him trickled down his arms, slowly warming the skin beneath Seifer's touch. As he held still, letting Ifrit's magic spread, he focused his eyes on Squall's face.

 

Despite all of the shit he'd been through, the feminine features Squall had grown up with hadn't faded away with time, and Seifer only felt a small pang of envy. Small, because Seifer knew he matched Squall's good looks with his own masculinity-- he'd known since childhood he was hot stuff, and the ladies that had once hounded him proved it.

 

Still... With all the time he'd spent being around Squall, he'd never seen him look so...peaceful. He wondered if perhaps only in his sleep Squall was capable of looking so unburdened. If so, it was a shame; it was a good look for him. Gazing at him, it was easy for Seifer to remember how he'd felt all those years ago. His stomach began to feel uncomfortable.

 

Seifer snorted. “Ice prince? More like ice princess...”

 

He nearly fell over from surprise as Squall's eyelashes moved, deep blue eyes opening to gaze up at him hazily.

 

“Squall?”

 

“...Seifer...?” Their eyes locked for a moment and Seifer did his best to ignore the warmth spreading through him that _wasn't_ Ifrit's doing. Squall's eyes once again closed. Seifer was relieved to see more colour in his rivals face and his chest rising and falling more visibly.

 

Ifrit's warmth began to recede. _“...the boy will be fine. He just needs rest now.”_

 

Seifer nodded. “Yeah. Me too.”

 

Despite his words, Seifer had a feeling he wouldn't be getting much sleep at all.

 

* * *

 

 

When Squall opened his eyes, he was looking up at an unfamiliar wood ceiling. His initial reaction was to look around quickly for Revolver, and once spotting it lying against the opposite wall, he calmed down and took a moment to even his breath.

 

_Where am I?_ The room was sparsely furnished, the only furniture being a bed, a nightstand, and a chair at the end of the bed. There was a window at the far end of the room by his gunblade. Light shone out it, though not bright, and as he focused his eyes, Squall saw snow falling. Sitting up, he shifted several blankets off of his body, noting with concern his ripped up clothes and the bandages that lay beneath. Trying to straighten up further left sharp pain shooting through his body, and he winced, hand flying to his right side. Experience told him it was likely a broken rib or two.

 

_...what happ-_

 

It came flooding over him without warning; memories of running through the woods pursued by monsters, the pain and blood everywhere, losing breath, Shiva trying to protect him...darkness.

 

He mentally reached out seeking Shiva.

 

“ _I am here child, do not fear.”_ Squall relaxed a little.

 

“What happened after I blacked out?”

 

Shiva seemed to hesitate. _“...I cannot say for sure. I defeated the beasts, but...I am not sure how we arrived here.”_ Squall frowned.

 

_Well, I guess there's only one way to find out._ Standing up slowly, Squall looked down at his shredded clothes. His eyes glanced at the nightstand, where a set of clothes were placed-- jeans and a dark red shirt. _Better than nothing._

 

Changing as quickly as he could without inciting too much pain, he noticed that the scent that lingered on the borrowed clothes seemed familiar somehow. Grabbing hold of revolver, he slowly opened the door leading out of the room.

 

 

 

Judging from the posters on the wall and the paperwork littering the desk nearest to the door, Squall was in a doctor's office. Outside the large window beside the desk snow continued to fall, coating the roofs of several nearby buildings and the tops of the pine trees.

 

_...Trabia, perhaps?_

 

Hearing footsteps from the hall behind him, Squall spun around, eyeing the man approaching cautiously. The man stopped, looking surprised.

 

“I hadn't expected you to be up and on your feet so soon!” He stuck his hand out, but upon realizing Squall wasn't going to shake it, let it drop down to his side. “I'm Henry, the doctor here in Frostfall.”

 

Squall blinked. “Frostfall?” The doctor chuckled lightly, walking around Squall and taking a seat behind the desk.

 

“You reacted just like he did his first day here. Same accent too...I take it you're from Balamb?” Squall frowned, narrowing his eyes at the man.

 

“There's someone else here from Balamb? Frostfall...is that near Trabia?” The doctor looked down at his paperwork, nodding.

 

“Frostfall is southeast of where Trabia Garden was once located, yes. And yes-- I believe you owe your waking up alive to Seifer Almasy. I patched you up as best I could, but you would have frozen to death if the boy hadn't found a way to warm you up.” The man looked up at him. “...lucky for you I noticed the matching scars or I wouldn't have thought to call him here in the first place.”

 

_...Seifer?_

 

Squall had at one point thought he dreamed of his old rival the night before, but perhaps it had been more than that. “Seifer is here? In this village?”

 

“Yes...has been for several years now.”

 

_So this is where he's been..._

 

The doctor interrupted his train of thought. “Anyway, most of your exterior wounds are fully healed, but you still have a broken rib that seemed resistant to magic, so you'll have to wait that one out the long way. Plenty of rest and some good food for the next couple of days should help you along.” Standing up, the doctor opened the front door and stepped out with him.

 

“The large building down the road is called the Nightingale Inn. Tell the owner, Dolly, that I've sent you. She'll fatten your right up.”

 

Squall wanted to ask more questions, but his stomach took that momentary pause to make him aware that he hadn't eaten for over day. Somewhat embarrassed, Squall said a quick thanks and decided to follow the man's suggestion.

 


	3. Out of the Cold

 

 

“...that should do it.” Wiping the sweat from his brow, Seifer Almasy took in the sight with pleasure. The hand-pulled wooden cart was full of perfectly stacked firewood. Surrounding the cart and scattered around the area were the bloody carcasses of various kinds of monsters. Killing the monsters had been first, of course. When he couldn't sleep (and he couldn't sleep more often than he liked) he resorted to what had become habit from his time at Garden-- tiring himself out until he couldn't stay awake any longer, or until he simply stopped caring.

 

Wiping the remaining bits of blood from Hyperion, Seifer slung the beloved weapon back in its proper place, and picking up the cart, he began the walk back to town.

 

_I'll worry about things later._

 

And there was much to worry about.

 

* * *

 

 

The warmth of the Nightingale Inn washed over Squall as he opened the large door and stepped in. There wasn't anyone in sight, though Squall thought he heard the sound of cupboards opening and closing near the back to what he assumed was the kitchen. Despite the lack of people, however, the building still seemed to give off a comfortable, welcoming feeling. Sitting on the table to his right was a bell, that he reached out and pushed.

 

After ten or so seconds of ringing silence, an older woman's voice could be heard yelling “Anna! Annaaaaaa! Where has that girl gotten to?!” A woman with mousy hair came hurrying out of the kitchen, shaking her head.

 

“I'm so sorry; my daughter is supposed to be working hostess right now, but I have no idea where she's run to.” Stopping in front of Squall, her eyes appeared drawn to his scar-- not unusual behavior for strangers, but after what the doctor had said, Squall wondered if it was because the woman had seen a similar one.

 

Squall's stomach growled. Embarrassed, but realizing that until he discovered where the rest of his stuff went he wouldn't be able to eat, Squall opened his mouth to relay what the doctor had said when the woman cut him off.

 

“My, you're such a scrawny thing! Let's fatten you up now dear-- take a seat wherever you want and I'll get the food going.” Surprised, he replied,

 

“I can pay-” but by the time he got the words out, the woman (he assumed was Dolly) was already heading back into the kitchen, humming something. Shrugging mentally, Squall took a seat by the fireplace, staring at the leaping flames. Without realizing it his eyes began to droop, but shot wide open as a door opened and a young woman's voice rang out,

 

“Mama! Have you seen Seifer? I can't find him anywhere!” Squall's heartbeat quickened, though he wasn't sure if it was the shock of the sudden voice, or if it was because he just wasn't used to hearing his rivals name anymore.

 

Dolly's voice came out loud and clear from the kitchen, and if he wasn't so interested in the response, Squall would have found himself wondering more intently as to why it seemed no one had an inside voice besides him.

 

“Haven't seen him all morning but the wood cart is gone-- he's probably out in the woods!”

 

There were footsteps and then a door opened, revealing a young girl, maybe around sixteen if Squall had to guess. She looked startled.

 

“Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't realize we had a guest!” As she walked up to him, he noticed how she was gazing quizzically at his forehead. However, he was the first talk, surprising himself.

 

“You know Seifer Almasy?” The girl looked surprised as well.

 

“Yes-- he's always helping my mother and I out around the inn.” She shook her head. “Forgive my rudeness. I'm Anna. Anna Hemmerfield.”

 

Squall's brows furrowed. _Seifer...helping? Are we really thinking about the same person?_

 

When the girl didn't leave, Squall realized she was waiting for him to introduce himself.

 

“Squall Leonhart.”

 

“Annaaaaa!” The girl looked like she wanted to say more, but bidding a quick 'excuse me' she hurried off to the kitchen, leaving Squall in comfortable silence.

 

Until someone threw the front doors open.

 

* * *

 

 

Throwing the front doors open to the inn, Seifer opened his mouth to call for Dolly, but stopped short as his eyes took notice of Squall Leonhart, who had from the looks of it jumped out of his seat.

 

_Skittish as ever._

 

However, as Seifer took in the sight of his former rival, he realized that not everything about the man was the same as he'd remembered. Now that he was standing in proper light, Seifer could see how thin and almost frail looking the Commander had become. _He's always been pale, but was he always **that** pale? _

 

Managing to find his voice, Seifer spoke his thoughts.

 

“Leonhart, you look like shit.” Frowning, the man answered the comment with a raised eyebrow.

 

“...” Seifer couldn't help but smirk.

 

“Talkative as ever, I see.” Walking up to him, he reached out, placing a hand on the other man's shoulder, and pushed him down into the seat he'd sprung from, trying not to show the concern he felt at how easy it had been to move him. Before Squall could retort angrily, Seifer was already walking past him into the kitchen, returning only a minute later with a bowl of something steaming (that Squall admitted smelled pretty good) and a plate of bread. Placing it down in front of Squall, Seifer took the seat across from him.

 

“Eat up Princess; you look famished.” Seifer was relieved to be receiving the familiar stare of death from Squall. After what seemed like half a minute, Squall appeared to concede and leaned forward to try the stew.

 

After the other man had had a few bites, Seifer leaned in close, forcing himself to gaze steadily into crystal blue eyes. _Were his eyes always so blue?_

 

“So, Leonhart; why are you here?”

 

Squall gazed back without blinking, face too unemotional to not be hiding something. Seifer frowned.

 

“...why are _you_ here?” Seifer raised an eyebrow, but didn't break eye contact.

 

“I live here.” It was Squall's turn to raise an eyebrow.

 

“Doesn't seem like your kind of place.” Seifer smiled grimly.

 

“There aren't many options out there for the ex-knight of a crazed sorceress who attempted to take over the world. However, I must admit that I've grown quite fond of this place, _so,_ ” jade green eyes glared into crystal blue, “I ask again; _why are you here_?”

 

What could have only been a few seconds of silent tension stretched into what felt like minutes, until finally Squall leaned back, looking a little less guarded.

 

“...it's not on Garden's orders, if that's what you're worried about.” Seifer felt the tension in his chest lessen slightly.

 

“So no one in the village should turn up dead or missing tomorrow morning then?” Squall shook his head, and Seifer felt a little more relieved. A little.

 

“...so why _are_ you here then? Frostfall isn't exactly a vacation destination. Its not even marked on most maps.”

 

Squall bit his lip and looked to the side, and while Seifer knew he should focus on how suspicious that behavior was, he instead found himself utterly distracted by how oddly attractive it made Leonhart look. Leaning back, he turned his eyes to the fire, not really expecting an answer from the brunet.

 

“...I'm looking for someone.”

 

As suspicious as it was to hear the brunet talking so much, Seifer had to admit that maybe he had missed hearing his rivals voice. Maybe.

 

“Someone?”

 

“...yes.”

 

Before he could probe more, the kitchen door flew open and Anna appeared, pulling a chair over to sit next to Seifer.

 

“You know I was looking for you all morning!” Seifer chuckled, ruffling the girl's hair fondly and causing her to pout.

 

“Sorry-- I left pretty early in the morning.” Seifer looked over from Anna to Squall, who had an eyebrow raised in question.

 

“Squall, this is Anna. Anna, Squall. He's a c-”

 

“Classmate. From school.” Squall cut in quickly, sending a glare in Seifer's direction. Seifer just shrugged.

 

Anna beamed. “Nice to meet you again! So did you come to visit Seifer? Will you be in town for a bit?” Seifer laughed at her enthusiasm.

 

“Don't get your hopes up Anna-- not only is Squally not social, but he's spoken for.” Anna blushed and promptly punched Seifer hard in the shoulder, causing the boy to not notice the slight pain that flashed through the other boy's face.

 

“Yeesh, you must've been practicing more lately-- that actually hurt!” With a look of pride on her face, the girl giggled, winking at Seifer playfully.

 

“Well, I have a good trainer.” Seifer I was going to expand on that compliment when Squall spoke quietly.

 

“...I would like to stay a bit. If that's possible.”

 

Seifer tried to ignore how his heartbeat sped up. _It's just because he needs to recover. That's all._

 

“You can stay at my place, if you want. You do look like you need a week's worth of sleep.” Squall glared darkly at him, and it almost made Seifer smile.

 

Almost.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Squall took in the sight of Seifer's house with curiousity, seeing as how he'd never lived in or owned a house of his own. It was a two story wooden cabin with a heavy front door with several windows on each story.

 

Opening the front door and looking hesitantly back at Squall, Seifer motioned for him to step in as he flipped on the lights.

 

“Well...this is my place.”

 

The front door opened into a cozy looking, well furnished loft. Past the comfortable looking couches and TV was an opening into a small kitchen. To the right of them was a hallway which led to the guest bathroom and a walk in closet. Dropping his bag, Seifer turned to gaze at Squall.

 

“Your stuff is in the closet down the hallway, if you want to change. There isn't much in the fridge since I mostly eat at the inn, but if you see something you like, help yourself to it.”

 

Squall nodded.

 

“The couch closest to you pulls out, so you'll have to sleep there.”

 

“That's fine.” Stretching, Seifer yawned.

 

“If you need me, I'll be upstairs. Just make sure to lock the door before you go to sleep.” Squall raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“...theft in this town?” Seifer shook his head, and although he was smiling, Squall could tell that it wasn't completely for humorous reasons.

 

“...just habit, I suppose.” With that, the other man headed up the wooden stairs, leaving Squall to the silence.

 

 

 

 

 

As Squall gazed up at the dark ceiling, lying on the couch, he let his thoughts flow out.

 

Seifer was right.

 

Squall _knew_ Seifer was right, although he was loath to admit it. He was out of shape, and his health had certainly been better. The fact that he'd allowed himself to be ambushed by those monsters the other night had just been proof.

 

Garden had been sucking the life out of him. Being both headmaster and commander was exhausting. The flow of paperwork was endless and his sleep never lasted long enough, when he could catch some. Eating had become restricted to whenever he could get away from his office. The only time he got into the training center was when he couldn't sleep, whether it be morning or night. It had all just become too much when-  


Shaking his head, he rolled over.

 

...though he didn't want to admit it, when Seifer walked through the doors of the inn earlier that day, Squall had noticed how _good_ the other man had looked. Between the two of them, Seifer had always been the more muscled one, but now...he'd seemed like he was in his prime. Toned, tan from being out in the sun and not stuck within Garden's walls...happy even.

 

Seifer had completely started over his life. And as Squall's eyes began to close, he couldn't ignore the fact that it seemed to suit his rival just fine.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For reasons I don't completely understand, this chapter was extremely difficult to get out. So I apologize if you can tell!


	4. Honesty

 

_The smoke hung heavy in the air as the buildings continued to burn down around him. The light from fallen embers reflected off of Hyperion's blade as he clutched it tightly in his hand. Trembling in front of him was a kid-- no more than eight years old from the look of it. The boy's face was caked in dirt and his eyes, filled with horror, were wide and stuck on Seifer, even as tears fell._

 

_Even through his hazy mind, Seifer knew what he was supposed to do. But perhaps for the first time since becoming Her knight...he found himself unable to move forward, the fog surrounding his thoughts thinning just slightly._

 

_He'd just made that boy an orphan._

 

_Probably made a bunch of orphans, if any had managed to escape._

 

_...was this what he'd always dreamt of being?_

 

_The cowering child in front of him stumbled backwards, and finding a sudden burst of energy, took off into the bank of smoke, disappearing from view._

 

_Was he supposed to feel relieved or ashamed?_

 

_A hand touched his shoulder in what was meant to be reassurance as his mind once again clouded over and as the magic from the Sorceress's hand prickled down his shoulder into his arm._

 

“ _It is alright, my Knight. Let the boy run and spread word of what happens to those who defy my will.”She smiled down at Seifer. “Let us move on.”_

 

_Seifer nodded and sheathed Hyperion, following the Sorceress out of the burning remains of town._

 

 

 

Seifer's eyes shot open, heartbeat thudding in his ears and body tense. As he had so many times before, he focused on the ceiling above him-- the wooden panels and the shape the lines made on them and the colour. The ceiling-- his ceiling. His heartbeat began to slow.

_I'm in my house. In Frostfall. In the middle of fucking nowhere._

He kept repeating the thought in his mind. Over and over. And like every time he had in the past, he wondered if maybe the war had taken his sanity among other things. The tense feeling in his muscles faded slowly, and by the time he rolled over to look at his clock, he no longer heard his heart beating away.

__6:00_ _

_Well...it's more than I normally get at least._ Getting up, he decided a long warm shower might be best.

 

* * *

 

When Squall woke up it was to the smell of cooking eggs and the sound of sizzling bacon. It was such a foreign experience that in a hazy state of panic he wracked his brain trying to remember where he was. It was only upon hearing the familiar voice humming (and at one point yelping and cursing from what he assumed was oil splatter) that reality came crashing through his foggy mind.

 

Sitting up, he winced as a sharp pain twinged from his ribs. Right... It had been so long since he'd been injured like this...since the War, perhaps. Just the sound of the couch moving under him was apparently loud enough to alert Seifer-- his rival's head popping around the corner to glare at him.

 

“Lie back down Princess-- you'll never get better if you don't take it easy. Breakfast will be ready soon.” Squall glared right back, but knowing the other man was right, he lay back down. He needed to recover-- he didn't have time to waste.

__Even now..._ _

 

A plate of eggs and bacon and a glass of water were placed in front of him on the coffee table, and as he sat up (carefully this time) Seifer sank down onto the couch beside him, a glass of water in one hand as he reached for the remote with the other.

 

Squall raised an eyebrow.

 

“You're not hungry?” Without looking away from the TV, Seifer replied,

 

“...already ate earlier.” Squall looked from the clock beside the TV, which read 8:15am, to the plate of food in front of him. _...how early did he get up?_ Squall remembered too well how during their school years Seifer would sleep in...to the point where he would waltz into classes incredibly late, a smirk on his face like he didn't have a care in the world. As if that wasn't odd enough...

 

__...he cooked only for_ me? _ Squall wondered for a split second if he should be worried about being poisoned. So perplexed by Seifer's actions, Squall hadn't even took notice of the new nickname the other man had begun calling him by.

 

The hesitation must have revealed his thoughts, because Seifer rolled his eyes and leaning over, took a bite off of a bacon strip.

 

“I know it must be shocking that no one is out to kill you for once Leonhart, but you need to eat. I'm not planning on housing you forever.” Seifer turned his eyes back to the TV. “...besides. I've missed having a sparring partner, and you won't heal up if you don't eat.”

He had a point, and the idea of being able to practice his gunblade technique against Seifer was very appealing, so with much less hesitation, Squall ate his breakfast in silence.

 

* * *

 

The day passed by quickly. Squall spent the majority of the day on the couch, either slipping in and out of sleep or gazing at the television-- a still relatively new concept to him. Seifer was in and out of the house, sometimes helping at the inn and sometimes sitting beside Squall on the couch, reading of all things (Squall had questioned it after the first fifteen minutes, to which Seifer replied “Just because I didn't enjoy reading those boring SEED training books doesn't mean I don't like to read”). It was quiet...peaceful almost. Squall couldn't remember the last time he'd experienced a day like it.

 

It was five in the evening, the sun setting slowly, when there were hurried knocks at the front door, making Squall jump in surprise. Looking over at Seifer and seeing his unsurprised expression, he relaxed a bit, though shifting a little to sit straighter on the couch. Placing his book down on the table, Seifer stood and made his way to the door, opening it slightly (but not enough for Squall to get a look at who was there). Whoever it was was speaking in a hushed murmur, so there was no way for Squall to understand what was being said.

 

The door closed, and Squall watched Seifer upstairs, only to return with his coat on and Hyperion strapped on tight. Jade green eyes glanced over to him.

 

“I'll be out for a bit. Try not to move too much.” Squall raised an eyebrow, glancing to Hyperion.

 

“...trouble?” Seifer shook his head.

 

“Just some work to do.”

 

Squall wanted to ask more, but before he could Seifer was already out the door and locking it behind him.

 

_I'll just have to ask later._

 

* * *

 

The days began to meld together, and Squall realized that Seifer's life was fairly routine-oriented, except when it came to waking up or his late-night 'work'. Without fail the other man was always up before him, however, at times he appeared groggier than others, and there were several times Squall would wake in the middle of the night only to see Seifer's light on upstairs. Despite that it had happened several more times since that first day of living at the other man's house, Squall still had not asked Seifer what exactly he was doing when he would go out at night.

 

Now able to get up and move without severe pain, Squall would accompany Seifer into the village during the day. He began to be able to put names to faces more easily, and perhaps it was because Seifer was always next to him, but the villagers seemed more friendly to him than he had expected from such a small town. He'd even grown (dare he say) fond of the Hemmerfield's once he became accustom to their lack of inside voices.

 

By the end of the second week, when the Doctor had finally given him the go-ahead to wield his gunblade again, he could almost understand Seifer's attachment to the place.

 

“Well, I'd say you're well enough on the mend to be swinging that piece of metal around again.” The doc chuckled and turned to gaze at Seifer. “He's still got a bit more recovering to do-- I wouldn't let him travel alone for another week at least.”

 

Squall looked down at his hands, his stomach turning slightly at the man's words, though he didn't feel sure as to why.

 

They went to the inn after that-- Seifer mentioning something about “celebrating”. But as Seifer and Anna chatted and laughed at a table with several other villagers, Squall found himself stepping outside into the chill night air, breathing in deeply.

 

The doctor's words had brought him disappointment. He was absolutely sure that was what he was feeling. But it was why he was feeling it that was making his insides twist. Guilt felt like a sharp dagger in his chest as chocolate-brown eyes came to mind...eyes he hadn't seen for too long now. Eyes shining with held-back tears...tears that were his fault. He knew he needed to hurry...that he couldn't stall without consequences. But...

 

“Squall!”

 

A warm hand was on his shoulder, and Squall turned to look into concerned jade-green eyes. Familiar eyes-- eyes he had grown up looking at.

 

Squall could still remember clearly the anguish he'd felt upon hearing of Seifer's supposed death when Sorceress Ultimacia had first come to power...knew he'd never forget it. Even finding out his rival was his enemy during the war hadn't affected him the same way as believing Seifer had died-- left for good.

When Seifer had disappeared after his trial, Squall was fine with it. He'd known Seifer was alive and trusted his rival would be able to survive wherever he went. But perhaps it had been because it had been months since they'd been around each other prior to the trial, that Squall had forgotten what it was like to have the other man in his life. To have someone that _knew_ him in his life.

 

Because in the full two weeks they'd spent together now, not once had Seifer demanded for Squall to let his guard down-- to spill his thoughts or his feelings. He hadn't even demanded what he could have rightfully asked for-- details as to why he was out in the middle of nowhere in Trabia in the first place.

 

That wasn't to say that the blonde hadn't been chatty or loud or obnoxious...but Seifer had acknowledged the space Squall kept between them and didn't question it. He never had. Seifer knew Squall's limits-- had pushed the boundaries several times just to see where they were. Their matching scars were evidence of that.

 

Now, being out here...Squall realized how much he enjoyed it. Not having to ward off friends demanding to know what he was thinking, not having papers shoved at him left and right, not having to pretend having feelings he didn't even feel an inkling of...

 

He didn't want to leave.

 

“...Squall?”

When he spoke, his voice came out faint and slightly choked, and he turned his gaze away from Seifer hurriedly.

 

“Rinoa.”

 

Seifer blinked at him in confusion.

 

“Huh?”

 

_“_ Rinoa...she's the one I was out looking for.” Seifer rolled his eyes and chuckled.

 

“Rinnie run away to Daddy again?” Spinning around, Squall glared at Seifer.

 

“If she'd just run to her father, do you think I'd have been out here searching the Trabian wilderness?” Seifer frowned.

 

“...what do you mean?” Squall bit his lip, frowning.

 

“...I...she...” He shook his head. “...I upset her, and the next morning she was gone. It was over a month ago now. We've searched all of the Balamb and Galbadia territories, but...we haven't found her. There's been no sightings of her.” Seifer paled.

 

“...you think she's been kidnapped...” Squall nodded stiffly.

 

There was silence between the two of them, as they gazed out at the snow falling.

 

“...worrying won't do you any good.” Squall crossed his arms, frowning as he gazed up at his rival.

 

“...I know.”

Seifer shook his head. “I...know it must be difficult, but you can't leave yet. Doc said you have at least a week more to go.” Squall looked down, a frustrated grimace on his face. “...we'll use this week to get you back into shape. You won't be able to do any good if you can't even handle protecting yourself.” Squall bit back a response as Shiva's cool voice drifted into his mind.

_'He is right, child. We are not as strong as we once were, but he can help with that.'_

“...you're right.” Seifer's eyes widened in surprise at Squall's words, and then the familiar smirk was back on his rival's face.

 

“Well, then-- we'd best get you to bed then. You're going to need all the rest you can get to stand a chance at knocking me down tomorrow.”

 

Squall felt a little warmer as a chuckle escaped him.

 

“...we'll see about that.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like the chapter before this, this chapter gave me difficulty as well. I'm pretty sure it's because the majority of it was done from Squall's point of view...Seifer's point of view comes much more naturally to me, and initially this story was going to be almost all from his viewpoint...but it would appear my brain thinks otherwise.


	5. Three Days Short

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had originally planned for this chapter and the next to be one, but then it ended up taking me so long to get this one done, that I decided to split them into two. I realize it's a slow chapter for a slow update, but bear with me-- things are gonna pick up!

**Chapter 5: Three Days Short**

 

**~Day 1: Limits~**

 

It was midday and small beams of sunlight were breaking through the overcast clouds above them, glinting off the polished metal of their gunblades as they faced each other, ready to strike, but neither moving. The familiar smirk and gleaming eyes on his rival's face was bringing back memories-- not of the last time they had faced each other, but the many times before. Just thinking about it made the blood coursing through his veins move quicker.

 

Like it had been back at Garden, Seifer was the first to move, running at him far quicker than Squall had expected, the other managing to parry the blow just in time. Squall's arms shook with the amount of force it was taking to hold Seifer back, and his eyebrows furrowed as he came to the realization that it hadn't been so difficult in the past.

 

Jumping back, he swung forward. Seifer matched all his blows, and Squall realized with some frustration that he was already beginning to feel weaker as Seifer only seemed to grow stronger.

 

_...how did I let this happen to me?_

 

 

Air hadn't tasted so good to Seifer in years. The feeling of swinging Hyperion and the sound of clashing blades made energy pulse through his veins, and he couldn't help the grin that broke across his face. Even with Squall's skills currently being a shadow of what they used to be, it was enough of a challenge and thrill to ease the ache of so many years without a practice partner. If anything, it made him even more determined to get his rival back into shape, if only for the selfish motive of having a personal challenge. It wasn't that the monsters he protected the town from weren't challenging enough, but there was just something more intense about facing off against another skilled fighter, especially one that he'd known since childhood.

 

Their blades continued to clash, the sound ringing out against the sound of leaves blowing gently in the breeze. Minutes flew by, but not without Seifer noticing the way Squall's stances became sloppy, his swings containing less power. The other man was reaching his limit, and Seifer knew he needed to end the match before Squall ended up doing more damage to his healing than helping it along.

 

Squall cursed under his breath as Seifer lunged forward, forcing him to hurriedly stumble back, only barely blocking Hyperion. Unable to hold up against him, Squall went to dodge to the left, only to find Hyperion had beat him to it and was sitting uncomfortably at his neck. Jade green eyes gazed into glaring crystal blue until Squall lowered Revolver, signaling the end of the match.

 

Both of them were startled by the sound of someone clapping.

 

Anna sat on the fence-line of Seifer's yard, grinning.

 

“That was amazing!” Seifer chuckled, and walking over placed his hand on her head, messing up her hair and smirking.

 

“If you think that's amazing, just wait until Squally's back in full health. Now _that_ will be a match to see.”

 

Across the yard from them Squall grumbled something under his breath as he sheathed Revolver and made his way over, rubbing at his neck as he eyed the girl in front of them carefully. He wasn't sure if he was unsettled because he hadn't heard her show up, or because he still wasn't used to the idea of Seifer having friends besides Raijin and Fujin.

 

Seeming to notice his guarded look, Anna turned to Seifer, smiling. “Are we still on for today?”

 

Seifer wiped some sweat from his forehead. “Of course! Just let me freshen up real quick and I'll meet you at the Inn.”

 

Hopping down, Anna waved at the other man. “See you later Squall!” Squall nodded, trying to ignore the way his mind had suddenly just spun in confusion at watching the exchange. Seeing his rival's face, Seifer laughed and ruffled Squall's hair as he passed by.

 

“Stop thinking-- you're going to hurt yourself.”

 

He didn't need to see the blue eyes glare daggers into his back to know they were there as he walked back to the house, chuckling.

 

 

 

 

By the time Seifer returned the sun was already descending and the night sky was beginning to appear. Closing the heavy wooden door behind him, Seifer stretched, just managing to stop himself short of flipping on the lights as he caught sight of Squall Leonhart, Commander of Balamb Garden and slayer of Sorceress Ultimacia, ...curled up on his couch, drooling in his sleep. Seifer chuckled silently.

 

_Our spar must have really worn him out..._

 

Thinking back to the reason for the exercise-- the conversation from the night before-- Seifer tried to ignore the way his heart sunk in his chest even as it beat quicker gazing at his sleeping rival's face.

 

_I don't have the right to feel this way._

 

 

 

 

**~Day 2: Community~**

 

 

When Squall opened his eyes, sunlight was already streaming through the windows and he was pretty sure he could hear birds chirping in the distance. It was silent in the house-- a contrast to the normal sound of Seifer banging away at breakfast on the stove. Squall couldn't help but notice how less oppressive silence seemed when one was fully rested.

 

Stretching, Squall sat up and noticed a piece of paper sitting on the table beside him. Picking it up, he recognized Seifer's scrawl (which hadn't improved in the slightest since his rival's time in Garden).

 

_No breakfast today-- you're going to have to fend for yourself.  
Will probably be out of town until the evening-- try not to worry._ (Squall let out a snort).

_Don't wear yourself out too much-- you're supposed to be healing._

_Later._

_-Seifer_

 

Standing up, Squall stretched. _Well, I guess I'm on my own today._ He nearly jumped as his stomach rumbled in protest. Glancing towards the empty kitchen, he sighed.

 

_Well, I guess I'll have to go out._

 

 

 

Stepping into the warmth of the Nightingale Inn, Squall felt himself relax slightly. It was empty and quiet. Squall would've thought it were closed if it weren't for the lights and the crackling fire in the fireplace. _Where is Anna and her mother?_ Realizing that without them there would be no food, Squall begrudgingly walked across the room and opened the door into the kitchen.

 

Looking around, Squall couldn't see anyone. Despite the absence of people, there were what appeared to be sausages cooking on the stove top and bread rising in the oven.

 

_...can't just leave them to burn..._ Noticing an apron hanging on the wall to his right, Squall threw it on and turned his attention to the sausage that clearly needed to be turned.

 

“Ah, wonderful! Looks like you can cook, eh?” Squall nearly jumped in surprise as Dolly Hemmerfield came in the back door, stopping beside him and wiping some sweat off of her face with the apron tied around her middle.

 

“Yes...although I haven't in a while.”

 

Despite what many would assume about the quiet Commander of Balamb, Squall was actually a fairly decent cook, and fairly good baker. Before he had become so burdened by work, Squall had regularly used baking as a way to relax. Only his closest friends were privy to that knowledge however (and one in particular abused it whenever possible).

 

Now that he was in the middle of it, Squall realized with a pang of regret how much he missed it.

 

“How about this-- you eat a good, full breakfast and then you can help me with some of the baking and cooking today, hm? I've got quite a lot to do for the upcoming festival, and not nearly enough hands to get it all done, what with my daughter disappearing left and right!”

 

Part of him was wanting to come up with an excuse to go back to Seifer's house and spend the rest of the day in solitude with a book, but part of him reminded him that he already had a debt to the woman and that upon returning to Garden, he wouldn't have such extravagant free time to spend baking things.

 

He turned to the woman and nodded. “Okay.”

 

 

 

 

By two in the afternoon they had finished up the necessary baking, and Dolly sent Squall out to get some fresh air. Not sure where to go exactly, Squall decided to just continue walking up the street. It had warmed up slightly, but there was a cold breeze blowing gently, and for a few seconds Squall was reminded nostalgically of the breeze that would blow through Balamb around mid-afternoon, carrying on it the scent of sea and sunlight. With a pang, he realized for a split second that he was nearly feeling home sick.

 

“Hey-- hey you!” Lost in his thoughts, it took Squall a minute to realize that someone was calling out to him, and coming to a stop, he realized that there was some kind of construction going on in the middle of the road, and it was one of the workers that had called to him.

 

Squall raised an eyebrow in question.

 

“Could you help me lift this plank up?” Looking around and seeing no one else, Squall inwardly sighed.

 

“Sure.” Together they hoisted it up, placing it on top of two other pieces of wood beams.

 

The man held out his hand. “Thanks. Don't think we've met yet. I'm Lucien, one of the construction experts in town.” Squall shook his hand.

 

“Squall Leonhart.”

 

“Right-- you're Almasy's friend! Was sort of hoping he'd be around to help today-- don't suppose you'd mind doing it in his stead? I'd be willing to pay.” Squall felt the urge to rub at his scar, but stopped himself. _Now is not the time to get on these people's bad sides._ He supposed he could give the money to his rival in return for housing him during his stay.

 

“...alright.”

 

 

 

It was four in the afternoon when Squall finally finished up helping with the construction. As he continued on his way up the street, his ears picked up the sound of running water to the left, and he noticed a grove of trees. _Must be a creek._ Making his way over, Squall figured he could enjoy some solitude there.

 

As he entered the grove of trees, he realized he could hear the sound of laughing children, and he sighed. _...maybe no solitude after all._ Planning to turn around and leave, he came to a stop just as a scream rang through the woods.

 

_Shit._

 

Running towards where the scream had come from, Squall found himself in front of a large, fast flowing creek. In the middle of it, holding onto a rock so as not to be driven away in the current, was a small girl-- certainly no older than five. Near the side of the creek were four other children, all looking panicked.

 

Cursing inwardly, Squall didn't hesitate to wade into the creek, gritting his teeth as the chilling water rushed around him. Reaching the child, Squall reached out and picked her up, placing her on his shoulders as he made his way back to the creek-side. Several of the children were gaping at him and some were cheering, and for a brief second it was the voices of children in his own past that Squall heard-- the voices of his friends at the Orphanage. Shaking his head, they faded away and he placed the girl down, kneeling down so he could look her in the face.

 

“Are you hurt?” She shook her head, but reached out and touched the scar between his eyes.

 

“...you are...” Squall's mouth quirked up in amusement.

 

“Not now. A long time ago.” The girl smiled.

 

“Oh!”

 

Squall turned to look at the other children. “All of you need to head home. Go back to the village.”

 

Probably just ecstatic that they didn't get yelled at, the children lept into action, running off towards the way Squall had come from. Sighing, but still faintly smiling, Squall watched them go, then followed. _I'd better get back to Seifer's and dry off..._

 

 

 

When Seifer opened the front door, the lights were on and the TV was playing the Timber News station on mute. Sitting on the couch with his head lulled to the side was a sleeping Squall. Chuckling, Seifer walked over, and bending low, blew air against his rival's ear. Squall jumped like a spooked cat, and seeing Seifer standing there laughing, glared.

 

“It's only six, Squally-- it's a good thing you're on the mend because I think you're becoming lazy here!” Squall looked like he was biting back a retort, but in the end just turned away, rubbing at his neck (which was undoubtedly sore from sleeping at such an odd angle).

 

“...what have you been doing all day, anyway?” Squall turned to gaze up at him. Seifer's jade-green eyes gazed back.

 

“My job. One of us around here has got to earn money, Princess.” He was expecting a glare from the nickname, but instead Squall just continued to gaze at him in what seemed a mix of curiosity and weariness.

 

“And what is it you do here, exactly?”

 

Seifer smirked.

 

“...get back in shape first, and then maybe I'll show you.”

 

 

 

 

**~Day 3: Light~**

 

“...what is _that?_ ”

 

Seifer pulled the mask from his face to gaze down at Squall's incredulous look and laughed.

 

“It's a wild beast mask. Brought one for you too.” Seifer unceremoniously dumped the mask coated in odd colours and feathers in Squall's lap.

 

“...but why do you have these?” Seifer sat down on the couch beside him, rubbing at his neck tiredly. Squall had to admit that the other man did look a little worse for wear...Squall wondered how much sleep his rival was actually managing to get, despite turning in for the night at relatively normal times.

 

“For the festival of course, Squally.” Squall raised an eyebrow.

 

“...you don't honestly expect me to wear this thing out in public?” Seifer sighed dramatically.

 

“You don't have a shred of respect for culture, do you?” Squall sighed.

 

“...what's this festival for, anyway?” Seifer leaned his head back against the couch, closing his eyes.

 

“Well, you know that before...recent events...there was an instance of Lunar Cry over Trabia, correct?”

 

Squall frowned. “Yeah.”

 

“Back when that happened, the villages that managed to escape the torrent grouped together...strength in numbers, I suppose. That's how Frostfall came to be. And, for the most part, it worked-- they were able to keep the monsters at bay. That is...until one moonless, winter night...” Squall rolled his eyes at Seifer's dramatic pause.

 

“A fearsome, dragon-like beast terrorized the village, making off with a child into the night. There was no one strong enough to best it. The next new moon it returned, once again stealing a child and killing the warriors who tried to fight it off.” Seifer stretched his arms and sat back up, turning to gaze at Squall. “...it continued on that way for nearly a whole year, until the first new moon of Autumn. When the beast returned to take another child, one of the village mother's stood in the street waiting, a mask on her face, decorated with the remains of other fallen beasts, prepared to fight for her child's life.” Seifer chuckled. “...the beast took one look at the mask and fled. Hasn't been seen since. The villagers gave the beast a name-- the Kaavra-- and made it tradition for the festival of Masks to be held every first new moon of Autumn.”

 

Holding the feathered mask to his face, Seifer shrugged. “...I'm not saying you have to believe it Squally, but the villagers believe the masks keep the Kaavra away. So why not play along with them for one night?”

 

Squall crossed his arms and sighed, looking down at the mask in his lap.

 

“...fine.”

 

 

Any other night the village would be quiet and calm, with mostly everyone indoors trying to keep warm. But as Squall followed Seifer down the street he found it quite opposite. The whole street was lit up by paper lanterns, lined with booths from which echoed the sounds of children playing games and the delicious scent of food. It was odd seeing everyone chatting and laughing together...in wild, somewhat frightening masks. Even in such a lively environment Squall still found himself flooded with thoughts-- how Selphie would love such an evening, how he'd rather be at home reading a book, how Rinoa would have tried to make him win her something pointless like a stuffed animal (a flash of guilt in his chest), how he would have bitterly refused to come if Seifer hadn't given him such a pitiful look with those bright, jade-coloured eyes (a sharper flash of guilt in his chest)...it took him a minute to realize that Seifer was waving a hand in front of his face.

 

“...hello? Anyone in there?” Rolling his eyes and pushing Seifer's arm away, Squall strode forward, determined to find something to do to keep himself out of his head. If he'd turned back, he would have seen a genuine smile on his rival's face.

 

 

 

Squall bolted up, reaching for Revolver reflexively as the sound of a fist pounding on the front door reverberated across the room. Seifer came down the stairs quickly and silently, looking like he hadn't slept a wink, Hyperion already in hand. Squall watched as he opened the door and relaxed slightly, recognizing the face on the other side. Squall got up, moving closer so that he could make out the face of Rauld in the doorway.

 

“Sorry to wake you two in the middle of the night, but it's important.” The man looked pale and grim. Seifer frowned.

 

“What is it? Fiends?” Rauld nodded.

 

“A big one. And it took a child with it.”

 

“Hyne.” Seifer turned to gaze at Squall. “Get your gear ready, Leonhart. We're going hunting.”

  


	6. A Day Too Late

  **Chapter 6: A Day Too Late**

 

The forest around them was quiet and dark with Seifer's flashlight being the only source of light and the sound of their combat boots crunching against broken twigs and thickening snow being the only constant sound besides the occasional hoot of an owl. They'd been lucky-- the beast had left large prints in the relatively fresh batch of snow, so tracking it was easy enough. Taking it down without a natural source of light, however, did cause Squall some concern, but he knew there was no need to voice it to his rival.

 

“So this is what you do, then.”

 

Seifer didn't reply right away, which was fine with Squall-- he hadn't been asking anyway. But then Seifer began to speak, somewhat quieter than normal.

 

“...after the War I had nothing but Hyperion. When I found Frostfall, they were having trouble with wild fiend attacks. Not many knew who I was or what I had done, but a few did-- the mayor was one of them. He understood that I needed a place to have a fresh start and offered it to me, with the only condition being that I would work for the welfare of the village. For a war criminal still hated and desired dead by most of the world, it was a...kind offer. Not one I deserved.”

 

The last time Squall had seen Seifer before Frostfall came to mind-- hazy memories of a darkened court room where his rival screamed for his execution that never came. Squall realized that logically death would have been the easier punishment for such a globally hated war criminal, and he'd known that Seifer knew as well. Yet the image of his rival seeking death so willingly...if Squall hadn't been wearing gloves, his nails pressing into his curled fists would have drawn blood. Shaking his head to help rid him of past memories, he sped up his walking pace.

 

“...you've changed.”

 

“...not enough.” Squall quirked an eyebrow and was about to ask what he meant when Seifer came to an abrupt halt, Squall just barely managing to avoid running into his back as the other man swore.

 

“...fucking Hyne. I think we're close. Look.”

 

Dotted along the ground on the sides of close entwined trees were blood stains, and sickeningly, what seemed to be some skin.

 

“We're too late.” Seifer shook his head, and Squall knew him well enough to be able to hear the way his voice shook with rage.

 

“...it'll move slower now. Make it easier for us to cut down.” Seifer started forward, less cautiously but with Hyperion out and ready. Squall followed, straining his ears for any noise in the darkened woods. They walked onward for another ten minutes until Seifer came to another halt. The sun was beginning to rise in the distance, and Squall could see the way his jade eyes glanced left and right in alarm.

 

“...something doesn't feel right.”

 

“I don't hear anything.”

 

It was only then that it occurred to Squall that he didn't hear anything _at all_. The sound of the forest and the life in it had disappeared, and this new silence was...wrong. It wasn't the silence that comes with emptiness.

 

It was the silence that comes with fear.

 

“Seifer! DUCK!”

 

Had Seifer not listened and acted on Squall's bidding, he realized with a slight gulp that his corpse would have been headless, as he felt a sharp swing of something above his head in the air and several strands of blond hair floated down in front of his face.

 

Seifer slowly straightened up with Hyperion at the ready as he stared straight into the black eyes of a rather large, feathered dragon. Seifer knew his rival so well that even without turning around to look, he knew Squall had an eyebrow raised.

 

“...well, we can consider that myth busted.”

 

The Kaavra gazed at them, unblinking, its jaw opening and black liquid oozing out slowly. Seifer's grip on Hyperion tightened as he recognized a scrap of cloth lodged between two of the beast's giant fangs.

 

“Do you still have some offensive spells equipped?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Good.” Seifer shifted into fighting position. “Try to stay out of range using those. Wouldn't do your healing process any good getting you killed.”

 

Never one for waiting games, Seifer charged forward with a yell, but instead of slicing forward, rolled to the right, cutting sideways at the beast's right wing and catching it off guard. The Kaavra let out an ear-splitting shriek, and Squall winced at the pain searing through his head, even as he aimed a blizarra at the creature as it spun to strike at Seifer. The sound of metal clashing against metal rang out as Hyperion slammed against the Kaavra's sharp claws as it reached out to grab at Seifer. He had just enough time to jump back to block the large spiked tail that had been creeping up behind him as it struck out at him. Unfortunately he had underestimated the strength of the tail, and he felt his feet lose contact with the ground as he was sent flying back, landing painfully on his back in front of the beast's reared head.

 

It all happened in the blink of an eye to him. One second the Kaavra's mouth full of sharp teeth was lunging down at him, black liquid landing on him in drops and sizzling like acid, but before he could feel the sharp, clean pain of impalement there was a clang, and suddenly he was staring up at his rival, and instead of more black ooze, scarlet blood was dripping down onto his forehead from where one of the Kaavra's larger fangs had sunk into Squall's upper arm. Revolver was lodged in the roof of the Kaavra's mouth, half of it exposed on the other side. The beast let out a final shriek before the life flashed from its eyes, and Seifer let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

 

As he got up to his feet, Squall let go of Revolver to reach over and left the head of the Kaavra up, pulling the large fang out of his arm at the same time, wincing and biting his (already bloody) bottom lip. Seifer reached up to give aid, holding the dragon's head in place so Squall could pull Revolver out.

 

Once they were both out of the way, he let the dead beast drop to the ground and turned his attention to Squall.

 

“That was a dumb move.” Despite the incredible pain he must have been feeling from multiple burns and the bleeding wound in his arm, Squall stared back with his crystal blue eyes and smirked.

 

“...a dumb move that saved your life.” Seifer rolled his eyes and moving forward, spun Squall around and started moving him forward to a fallen tree.

 

“Yeah yeah...sit down so I can take a look at you.”

 

 

 

 

As Squall shrugged out of his torn jacket, Seifer made sure to keep his eyes firmly focused on the oozing open wound on his rival's arm as he kneeled in front of him. Reaching down into his bag, he felt around until he found the roll of bandage. Tending to Squall's wounds...felt normal. More normal than he'd felt in a long while. Too many times to count he'd done so when they'd train late into the night in Garden and couldn't go to the infirmary because they'd break curfew. He let himself fall into the familiar process, only being brought out of it when he felt Squall's thumb brush against his forehead. Only then did he forget to not look up. Squall's voice was quiet.

 

“You've got some blood there.” Seifer chuckled lightly as he inwardly gulped, gazing up into those serene blue eyes.

 

“Yeah. Yours.” Squall's lips quirked as he chuckled faintly, his thumb moving to the side where there was a small burn, leaving his hand against the side of his rival's face.

 

“...for a second there, I really thought you were going to die.” Seifer would have rolled his eyes if he could pull his gaze from Squall's.

 

“Do you really have such little faith in me?” Squall leaned forward a little, as if searching his eyes for something.

 

“...wasn't the first time I've had to worry about that.”

 

Seifer opened his mouth to reply that Squall shouldn't be worrying in the first place, but stopped short as he felt soft lips press against his own, the sweet taste of his rival's mouth marred by the iron taste of blood from the cracks in his lips. The bandage fell from his hand forgotten as he leaned forward, placing his hands on Squall's face, deepening the unexpected kiss. Part of him was wondering if he'd actually been killed by the Kaavra after all and entered the afterlife, but the irritating stinging from his burns told him otherwise. He was just surprised that it hadn't been him that started it.

 

_Wait._

 

Pulling back sharply, mind reeling, he gazed at Squall in confusion, trying to not let the sight of Squall with mussed hair and slightly swollen lips make him do or say something stupid.

 

“... _you_ kissed _me_...” He tried to wrap his head around that. Squall bit his lip, one arm reaching to grab at the other, only to cause him to wince upon remembering he was wounded. Noticing, Seifer picked up the bandage and started wrapping it around Squall's arm, feeling a little better at having something to do with his hands.

 

“...Rinoa wouldn't like that.” When he looked up at his rival, he saw guilt across his face and his stomach dropped. Seeing the look on Seifer's face, Squall shook his head.

 

“Rinoa and I...aren't together. Not anymore.” Seifer raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“Since when?” Squall sighed, looking down.

 

“Over a month ago. Well, almost two now.” The dots started to connect in Seifer's mind.

 

“ _...that's_ why she ran away?” Squall closed his eyes.

 

“She'd...been unhappy. She felt more...wanted more, than what I could give or feel.” Squall opened his eyes, and Seifer could see clearly the bitterness and pain. “Don't misunderstand-- I do love her. Care for her. But...not in the way she desired. When she...confronted me about it, I'd already had a bad day, and I...didn't choose my words wisely.” Squall rubbed at his hair, gazing at the ground tiredly.

 

“I made her cry. And before I could realize how much I'd said wrong...she was gone.” There was a moment of silence as Seifer tried to process all of what Squall had said. When he looked back up at his rival, Squall was gazing at him, biting his lip. He looked...vulnerable. Seifer couldn't remember him ever looking that way before.

 

“...okay. But...us. How long...?” Squall's gaze darted to the side.

 

“I...don't know when exactly it started. But...when Ultimecia made her appearance, and you...you...” Squall's sentence trailed off, and when he picked it up back up his voice was raw. “...the world didn't feel right without you in it.”

 

 _Okay. Enough._ Seifer wrapped his arms around Squall, pressing his lips eagerly against to his rival's in a way he'd been dying inwardly to do since Squall's sudden appearance in Frostfall. No...since before. Before the War even. Suddenly nothing else mattered-- the burns, cuts, the freezing cold, the returning back to the village with bad news-- it all melted away in the feeling of finally, _finally_ kissing Squall Leonhart. Finally, something going right in his life.

 

He really didn't want to stop, but when Squall let out a small gasp in pain as he moved his arm, he pulled back, both of them breathing heavy. “...we should probably head back so we can wash that wound...” Squall nodded, also looking both disappointed but relieved.

 

 

 

 

 

The walk back to the village through the woods was quiet. Both of them, without speaking of it out-loud, were wondering about the exact same thing. _...what are we going to do now?_ Squall had spent enough time in the village now to know that Seifer had a good life-- the villagers liked and respected him, and if the Kaavra was any evidence, _needed_ him. Surely he wouldn't want to give that up to head back to a world that still wanted him dead.

 

They were so lost in their thoughts that they realized too late that the forest had once again gone eerily silent. Only when they smelled smoke did they realize something was wrong. Glancing at each other, they pulled out their gunblades, running forward towards the village.

 

The sight in front of them made them come to a halt.

 

“...no....”

 

Hyperion fell from Seifer's hand. His vision began to spin as the smell of smoke and burnt flesh surrounded him-- sucking the breath out of his lungs. His hands went to either side of his head as he tried to stop his head from spinning in vain. His heartbeat thudded in his ears as he felt himself phasing into two places at once. He could hear himself hyperventilating yet he couldn't feel it at all. Couldn't feel anything. The world was numb. He fell to his knees, unable to stand.

 

In front of them, Frostfall lay in fire and ashes.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, thank you for all of the reviews and kudos on this fic :) I feel honored that so many of you are enjoying it.
> 
> I hope the ending of this chapter caught you by surprise-- that was a main goal of mine when I first came up with the idea of the village Seifer ended up in. Does that make me evil...? Maybe a little.


	7. Blindsighted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may have noticed that there are some updated tags. I think I made it pretty obvious from the way the previous chapter ended, but just in case-- yes, Seifer suffers from PTSD and does have a panic attack due to the similarity between previous situations he was in as well as the way Ultimecia essentially mind-raped him.
> 
> Anyway, I apologize in advance to anyone expecting a decent-length chapter. This is a short one because it's sort of the "ending of the first arc" of the story, you could say. If I'd continued it, it just wouldn't have flowed the way I desired, so I decided to cut it short instead. I'm hoping to make each story arc about seven chapters long, so that's why the chapter number has been updated to twenty-one.

 

 

**Chapter 7: Blindsighted**

 

_A burning village. The stench of burning flesh. Screams. Blood on his hands-- so much blood. Everywhere, crimson. Deja vu. Nightmares. Shaking. And the familiar soft, soothing voice-- the voice wrapping itself around his frantic disarray of thoughts like a soft, velvety cocoon, telling his screaming inner-voice to hush quietly-- to hush and continue forward. To keep going. Keep going. Stop thinking, start moving. Laughter...his? His face ached-- was it from frowning or grinning? He wanted to shut his eyes, but the voice pressed him to keep going. It comforted him. Made him feel safe. Made him feel drowsy. Made him ignore the red and the flames and the blood._

 

“Seifer!” Squall tried to shake Seifer's shoulders. “Seifer!” His rival was shaking, pale as a ghost, with his hands over his ears like he was trying to block out sound, and it was only when he got close enough to hear his rival repeating “get out of my head” in a pained voice that he understood. Understood the the long nights and early mornings and shadows under and in his eyes. He was ashamed at how he'd missed it-- how many classes had they had at Garden describing those exact symptoms?

 

Squall wanted to stay at Seifer's side, but as he turned his gaze back to the mostly destroyed and on-fire village, he knew he needed to check for survivors-- to see if anyone needed help. Placing his bag next to his rival on the ground, he murmured a quick, “I'll be right back Seifer” and rushed towards the destruction.

 

“Hello?!”

 

There was only the sound of crackling flames. As he reached the center of the village he came to a halt, gulping and quickly looking away as his stomach turned. The slightly snowed street was covered in pooling blood from the massive pile of sliced up bodies, most of which were charred and a few still remaining on fire. If his younger self that hadn't already gone through a major war had stood in his place, he was sure he would have been on the ground dry-heaving. Instead, he took a few steady breaths through his mouth, steeled himself mentally, and moved forward towards the pile.

 

He was bothered by a couple of things that didn't seem right, the most obvious being that the carnage was too orderly to be a simple monster raid. A mindless fiend like the Kaavra wouldn't have stacked the bodies so...neatly. There was also the fact that the bodies were _still there_.

 

As he spent several minutes glancing over the visible bodies, his eyes widened in alarm. _What the-_

 

“...they were all killed the same way, weren't they?” Squall turned around to gaze at Seifer. He was still fairly pale and looked a little shaky on his feet, but the eyes gazing back at Squall were crystal clear. He turned his gaze back to the carnage in front of him as Seifer walked up to stand beside him.

 

There was a time and place to discuss what had happened with his rival, but Squall knew it wasn't the present.

 

“Yeah.” Seifer was stiff as his eyes gazed at each corpse in turn.

 

“...a blade, from the look of it.” Squall nodded, silent.

 

They remained standing in silence for a while, until Seifer finally turned away from the carnage and glanced over to Squall.

 

“There's something I need to check; then we can go.”

 

 

 

Squall had expected them to head to to the remains of Seifer's house, but instead they headed the way they'd came, Squall pausing to grab his bag before following Seifer back into the outer-edge of the woods. After a minute of silent walking Seifer came to a halt in front of a tree with a small hollow. Squall watched as Seifer reached a hand into the hole and grinned triumphantly as he pulled out a flower.

 

“...that's my girl.” As Squall raised his eyebrow and opened his mouth to ask, Seifer turned and handed the flower to Squall. Squall took it and gazed at it in confusion. _...it looks familiar._ His brain, well-versed in botany from countless hours of studying for class made the connection, and he glanced at Seifer.

 

“A nightingale.” Seifer nodded, still smirking darkly.

 

“...when she found out about my past, Anna asked me to train her in self-defense. I was training her to shoot. We kept her pistol in this tree, and we agreed that if she were ever in need of it or in danger, she would take it and leave a flower to let me know she was safe.” His rival let out a sigh of relief. Squall turned his gaze from the flower in his hand to the tree, stiffening slightly.

 

“...did you mark it? The tree?” Seifer shook his head.

 

“Nah. We didn't want to make it obvious.” Squall frowned.

 

“...then what is that?” Squatting down, he looked closely at the mark carved into the surface of the tree. Seifer followed beside him, also frowning.

 

“...it wasn't there before. Anna must have drawn it.” Squall traced the mark-- a diamond with eight lines shooting out of it like branches, circles on each end. Seifer squatted down next to him, eyebrow arched.

 

“...never seen it before.”

 

Squall frowned. “...I...think I have. Somewhere.” Something about the mark unsettled him. Breaking his eyes away from it, he reached into his bag, pulling out what appeared to be a small metal device. Flipping it open, Squall held down the power button as Seifer gazed at him in confusion.

 

“What's that?”

 

“A mobile. It's a device Esthar is currently working on. Allows you to email long distance and make calls.” Seifer blinked.

 

“Huh?” Squall sighed. The screen flickered on, and he pressed the button for the camera.

 

“Imagine a handheld phone that doesn't need to be plugged into a power source or line, that has a computer in it.” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“...is that even possible?” Squall rolled his eyes.

 

“...now that Adel's tomb is out of the way, yes.” Holding the mobile in front of the strange symbol on the tree, he snapped a picture. “...doesn't do much good out here in the middle of nowhere, but if we were a bit closer to Esthar or one of the other major cities, I could contact Garden.” He shrugged. “I can at least take pictures with it however.” Flipping the device closed and powering it off, he turned to Seifer.

 

“When we get closer to Esthar, I'll send the picture to Quistis. Something about it...bothers me.” They both stood up, giving one last glance to the tree.

 

“We're heading to Esthar then?” Squall nodded, frowning.

 

“...I doubt whoever took Rinoa would take her back into the Balamb area, and I want to check with Laguna...see if what happened here has been happening anywhere else.”

 

As Squall hefted his bag, Seifer turned his back to him, gazing up at the snow covered pines and letting the frigid chill settle into his bones and the silence of the woods deafen his still scattered thoughts for the briefest moment.

 

_...why did I think I could stop running?_

 

 

Turning to familiar face of the Commander of Balamb Garden, Seifer nodded.

 

“...alright. Let's go.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've read several FF8 fics that have used cell phones, Batsutousai's being the most detailed. I don't want to come off like I'm stealing anyone's ideas, so I'm not planning to go into any detail about them beyond what has already been said. They're simply something useful for moving the plotline forward, as you'll see in approaching chapters to come.
> 
>  
> 
> That being said, I hope you're enjoying the story so far. :)


	8. Nightmares

**Chapter 8: Nightmares**

 

_He gazed up at the night sky as the glow from the campfire flickered in the slight breeze. Lying on his back, staring straight up at the stars, Seifer could almost feel awed. The night sky never appeared the same-- always shifting, flickering, extending beyond imagination...so unlike the world he was stuck on. The world was small-- smaller than he'd realized years ago. The knowledge of how minuscule it really was weighed on him like a burden, and he knew it was something he'd need to accept-- that there was no escaping it, and no escaping himself._

_Well, there was, but he wouldn't sink so low. Every time the voice in the back of his head brought that up as an option he firmly shot it down. He may be a traitor and murderer, but he wasn't a coward._

_The voice also occasionally brought up the fact that he didn't necessarily have to be the one to do it-- that there were countless others who'd gladly do it for him if he so much as showed his face in the right places, but no-- Seifer saw no difference between those two situations._

_So here he was-- lying on his back staring up at the sky miles from the nearest point of civilization._

_He didn't know what he hoped to find in the snowy mountains and thick forests skirting the border of Trabia and Esthar. Maybe he was just running away. Maybe he was chasing a false hope that there would be some place on this tiny, tiny world where he could start over._

_Maybe he was searching for himself._

 

 

 

“It's pretty damn imposing, isn't it?” They'd paused in their second day of the journey, staring up at the giant slope of the side of the Trabian crater. As Seifer turned his gaze to look at Squall's face, he could have sworn he saw one of his rival's eyes twitch.

 

“...it's a pain in the neck.” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“It's not like we have to climb it Squally...we've just got to skirt around the edge of it. Piece of cake.” Squall resumed walking.

 

“Let's go then.” Seifer chuckled as he followed along beside him.

 

“...you're really on edge, aren't you?”

 

“.....” His rival didn't even bother to dignify the question with a response. Seifer followed up the silence with something that he'd been wondering about for a while.

 

“You and Rinoa are connected through that sorceress-knight bond, right? Shouldn't you be able to sense her or something?” More silence. Seifer was about ready to give up on waiting for an answer when Squall sighed.

 

“...I can...up to a certain degree. I think Rinoa was learning more about it before...she left. She'd beentraining with Matron.” Squall didn't have to look over at Seifer to know the other man was fidgeting uncomfortably.

 

“...how is she doing? Matron, I mean.”

 

“She's doing well. Cid too. They're living quietly in Centra.”

 

“At the Orphanage?”

 

“Its been fixed up...almost looks nicer than when we were there.” Squall's lips quirked in a small smile, and Seifer gulped mentally as his body reminded him how damn handsome Squall Leonhart looks when he expresses emotions.

 

“It's just them?”

 

“For now. They both agreed that they need some time to rest.” Seifer nodded, feeling slightly relieved. Lost in momentary thought, he didn't notice the way Squall's eyes trailed on him a bit longer than to be expected, concern briefly showing on his normally-stoic expression.

 

They traversed most the day in silence with occasional conversations. Rocky edges of the crater's sides gave way to forest, and finally to the plains of Mordred. By the time they stopped to make camp the sun had given way to the night sky and the Vienne mountains stretched up like giant shadows ahead of them. As they sat around their flickering campfire eating, Squall wondered how to put into words what he was thinking, or if he should bother bringing it up at all.

 

It would be so easy if it were a squad member-- he could argue that it was a safety concern that would put the squad in danger. But Seifer wasn't a squad member-- wasn't even a SEED-- and this wasn't a mission really. And Seifer...Squall didn't know what Seifer was...a rival? A friend? Something more? Their kiss the day previous sure had felt like more.

 

“What's making the Ice Princess blush?” Jolted from his thoughts, Squall looked up to meet Seifer's smirking eyes across the fire.

 

“Huh?” Seifer raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

 

“...you looked pensive. But I suppose you do most of the day.” Squall went to trace his scar (a habit of frustration) only to wince at the pain shooting up his injured arm. In nearly the blink of an eye Seifer was at his side, reaching out and unraveling the bandage to inspect the wound.

 

“I know you're the type of person that would rather do everything yourself, including something as simple as carrying equipment, but if you don't let yourself heal up it'll be more of a burden for both of us down the line.” As Seifer muttered a quick cure spell under his breath and its warmth spread from his hand into the wound, Squall realized his earlier thoughts had been borderline hypocritical. He sighed, and Seifer looked up at him expectantly.

 

“...you take first watch.” A brief look of surprise flashed across his rival's face before it melted into an oddly gentle smirk.

 

“Sure thing _Commander_.” Squall groaned as Seifer cackled.

 

“Shut up, Seifer.”

 

 

 

Their first night of the journey Squall discovered Seifer suffered from nightmares.

 

It shouldn't have surprised him. After all, he already knew Seifer suffered from PTSD, so the nightmares would only make sense. Still, something about seeing his rival, whom for most of his life appeared to have absolutely no fear, shuddering and crying out in his sleep from nightmares or memories (Squall couldn't possibly know which) both unnerved Squall and made a hatred burn inside him that he hadn't felt for several solid years. Looking down at the panicked jerks the man made in his sleep brought back the image of Seifer so many years ago under the blazing lights of the conference room being handed his pardon. He'd been panicked back then too...a panic that reminded Squall of a caged and cornered rat. How long had Seifer Almasy felt like a caged rat?

 

Reaching down tentatively, Squall gently took hold of one of Seifer's hands. Although Shiva had taken most of his memories of his time at the Orphanage, he could remember just faintly a night he suffered from nightmares and Sis had held his hand-- she'd claimed that it was to keep him from getting lost inside the terrible dreams. His teenage-self would have rolled eyes at such a notion, but he'd been through and seen crazier things now...things that would (and had) given himself sleepless nights.

 

...maybe it was just him imagining things or becoming drowsy, but it almost seemed to help.

 

 

 

 

As they made their way up the Vienne mountain pass Squall began to notice a change in his rival as he cast the occasional glance behind him. While Seifer had started off leading them, he now followed behind Squall, his steps almost seeming hesitant. The man's trademark smirk was replaced by a half frown, his eyes appearing cool but looking far off, as if he were lost in his thoughts. Distracted. Quiet. It didn't help that the only real sound as they made their way up was the sound of the wind gently whistling past them and the occasional cry of a crow.

 

It only occurred to him when they reached an old, rickety bridge and he spotted a rat darting underneath the backside of it what could be causing Seifer's reaction. He stopped, turning to gaze at his rival's face, eyes flickering from the matching scar to Seifer's puzzled expression.

 

“What is it?”

 

Squall frowned. “Seifer...are you okay with this? Going back?” Seifer looked away, Squall noticed, as he replied,

 

“...well, its been three years. It's...probably time.” When Seifer turned his gaze back to Squall the smirk returned to his face. “Besides-- can't let you get mauled to the brink of near death _again_.”

 

Squall rolled his eyes, and turning around continued forward.

 

“Whatever.”

 

With his back turned he couldn't see the smirk slide off of Seifer's face and the haunted shadows showing through his rival's eyes as he moved to follow after Squall, each step feeling heavier than the next.

 

 

 

 

 

The second night of the journey Seifer discovered Squall still suffered from nightmares.

 

While Seifer had been given a GF around the same time the other's had, he'd never felt a desire to really use or bond with it while he'd been at Garden, always preferring to rely on his own strength and power. As a result, while the others slowly began to lose their memories of their time at the Orphanage, Seifer managed to retain a good amount of his own. So when he sat beside the embers of their fading campfire , gaze lingering upon his rival's sleeping form, he wasn't surprised so much by the fact that his rival was having nightmares, his face contorted in unconscious turmoil, but that Squall was _still_ having nightmares. When they'd ended up being the only two left, only a few months before they were moved to Garden, the two ended up sharing a room. Matron had thought that because they were the most familiar with each other, that maybe it would bring them a source of comfort after losing their friends one by one to adoption. It was when they began to share a room that Seifer discovered Squall's consistent nightmare problem. Too many nights Seifer had woken and looked across to see Squall twitching in his sleep, crying out. Most of the time it was for Sis, but sometimes Seifer got the feeling that it was for someone else entirely.

 

As he gazed at Squall's older, battle-scarred face, he found himself wondering if he was part of those nightmares now as well.

 

 

 

 

It was late-afternoon on the third day of their journey when Seifer noticed a change in Squall's demeanor. They were about half way down the pass with the view of the Mordred plains stretching out before them and the shadow of the Nortes mountains in the distance. While Squall was a naturally quiet person, Seifer knew the man well enough to know that he was being more silent than normal. The longer they walked, the more Squall seemed to become pensive, rubbing at his scar like it was causing him pain. Seifer frowned. _A headache maybe?_

 

As the sun began to lower in the sky Squall came to a complete and unexpected halt, and Seifer just only managed to avoid bumping into him from behind.

 

“...something's...wrong...” Seifer's hand went to Hyperion's hilt.

 

“Monster?” Squall shook his head, eyes closed.

 

“No...it's...” Seifer noticed Squall's legs shaking only a few seconds before the man nearly fell to his knees, Seifer lunging forward and catching hold of him just in time.

 

“Squall?” Squall's hands clamped around his ears, as if trying to block out a noise Seifer couldn't hear.

 

“...screaming...” Squall's eyes shot open. “Rinoa!”

  

Before Seifer could even open his mouth to ask what was going on, the ground beneath them shook.

 

“An earthquake?!”

 

But as if the universe was trying to tell Seifer his guess was wrong, off in the distance on the Mordred plains, a heavy plume of black smoke emerged.

 

An explosion.

 

Squall took off running, Seifer cursing as he followed.

 

He had a _very_ bad feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finding the rhythm for this chapter was very difficult for me because ultimately this chapter was made up of chopped up scenes. It feels stilted and stiff, but ultimately that's the feeling it needed to have because that's how Seifer and Squall were feeling at the time.
> 
> You can expect shit to hit the fan in the next chapter though.


	9. Change

 Rinoa brought her arm to her mouth, trying not to breathe in smoke as she coughed violently, trying to ignore the panic when she felt something warm come out of her mouth and hit her arm. Looking down, her eyes flickered over the blood momentarily before the glanced back to the dark shadowy form standing not to far from her.

 

Bringing up her hands, the shield of light just barely surrounded her in time as another burst of energy exploded from the figure, the ground shaking beneath her and rocks hurtling at her only to bounce off the magic. The shield flickered and faded, and calling upon the para-magic she had junctioned, Rinoa ran forward, shooting fire at the figure. The figure ran forward, dodging the fire unnaturally quick, and Rinoa just barely dodged to the right in time to avoid the slice of a blade aimed at her side. As she spun around to face the attacker a heavy-booted foot collided with her abdomen with so much force she flew back, skidding along the dusty ground. The figure began walking to her, a low-pitched voice reaching her ears.

 

“...pathetic. All that power...potential...wasted.” Struggling to her knees, Rinoa wiped the blood trickling from a cut on her face with her hand. She shook her head, looking up to glare at the figure.

 

“...I'm just starting!” Like a painting, pale white feathers took the form of wings, growing from the sorceress's back and she got to her feet. Light flickered in the palm of her hand, taking the form of a sword that she gripped tightly with both hands.

 

The figure-- a man judging from the deep voice-- laughed, throwing his arms up to his sides, the sleeves of his black cloak billowing in a barely noticeable breeze. Around them dark clouds began to materialize as the ground shuttered beneath them. One moment the figure was there, the next Rinoa had barely enough time to bring her sword up to block the blade that swung at her chest.

 

As she less gracefully parried the man's blows and her arms started to become heavy as she made swing after swing she couldn't help but feel regret that she'd turned down all the extra practice Squall had offered her back at Garden. It seemed like as she got weaker, her enemy was only becoming stronger, and she couldn't help the rising panic she was feeling.

 

_I can't die here! I can't!_

 

She let out a scream, light flashing before her eyes as her sword went flying from her hand and pain split across her chest, blood falling from the open wound and the two rings she carried with her always falling from the broken chain around her neck, falling to the ground and rolling away. She fell to her knees gasping, the world suddenly appearing unsteady. She could hear the sound of her enemy walking up behind her.

 

“RINOA!”

 

Rinoa's head shot up to gaze straight ahead as two figures emerged from the dark fog that had covered the plains. Even through her failing vision she could make out the outline of Squall against the darkness. She smiled in relief even as the sharp metal blade stabbed through her back and heart, emerging bloody from her chest, and the last bit of light in her eyes faded.

 

Squall let out a sound Seifer had never heard from his rival before-- the sound of a soul near shattering. A roar and scream merged into a howl of agony. Seifer had Hyperion up and ready, prepared to run after Squall into battle, but he only realized something was wrong when Squall fell to his knees, gripping his chest in pain, like he'd been stabbed as well. Seifer tried to ignore the spike of panic that shot through his blood at the thought.

 

“Squall?” Squall's figure seemed to be shaking, struggling to keep steady. Eyeing the unmoving figure across from them, standing above the dead body of Rinoa, Seifer cautiously lowered himself so he was kneeling beside Squall. “Squall, what's-”

 

Before Seifer could finish the question Squall let out a shriek, eyes rolling back to expose the white before he collapsed onto the ground.

 

“Squall!” Standing up, Seifer pointed Hyperion at the figure who seemed to almost be fading. “What did you do to him?!”

 

“...nothing.” The voice was emotionless. Growling, Seifer ran forward, swinging Hyperion only for it to sail through the space that the figure had occupied.

 

He'd disappeared like mist.

 

“Shit. Shit shit _shit_.” Seifer ran back over to Squall, feeling along his neck and feeling a moment of relief when he felt a pulse, although weaker than it should be. Going for Squall's dropped bag, he fumbled through the belongings, muttering under his breath like a mantra _'don't you fucking die on me now Leonhart'_. Finding what he was looking for, he ripped the mobile out of the bag and tried to remember the conversation they'd had about it a few days prior. Squall's voice rang out in his memory.

 

_If for some reason we get attacked and I can't do this myself, you need to use this and call Quistis._

 

Flipping open the mobile to reveal the screen, he held the power button like Squall had taught him, and once the screen turned on, found the call list and pressed on the entry for 'Trepe'. _Fucking Hyne, let this work!_ Pressing it to his ear, all he heard was static at first, but after thirty seconds about a familiar voice spoke into his ear.

 

“ _Hyne, Squall! Where have you been?! Do you have ANY idea how-”_ Seifer cut her off.

 

“Trepe. We need help.” There were several seconds of silence and Seifer grit his teeth.

 

“ _...Seifer? Why do you have-”_

 

“There's no TIME Trepe! Rinoa's dead and Leonhart is...” He couldn't get the words out. “...he needs medical attention ASAP.” Quistis's breathing sounded shaky on the other side of the line.

 

“ _...Hyne! Do you know how to send coordinates on the mobile?”_

 

“Yeah.” He gulped. “...I think I can do that.”

 

“ _...okay. Send them and we'll get over there as soon as possible.”_

 

Hitting the red button, Seifer pressed a few more buttons until he managed to find the coordinates of the mobile's location. It took him a couple tries to figure out how to copy it, but finally he managed to get them in a message and sent. Flipping the mobile shut, he pocketed it, and returned his attention to Squall. Reaching out, he rolled his rival onto his back, stroking the hair out of his face and letting out a hiss as he pulled his hand back quickly.

 

_He's burning up bad!_

 

Gritting his teeth, Seifer stood up shakily and walked over to the motionless body of Rinoa. Gulping, he knelt down and placed a hand gently over her eyes, closing them.

 

Rinoa hadn't been a bad person. Sure, she had been immature, a bit obsessive, and pretty dense, but he knew that beneath her selfish ambitions was a heart that cared for others. If she'd been given the time, she might have even made a decent leader. Despite the terrible blood loss and wound running through her chest, she still managed to look angelic in death, the smile she'd had when killed remaining on her face. It made Seifer nauseous.

 

With everything he'd experienced so far in life, he'd have thought he'd be used to staring death in the face.

 

 

He wasn't.

 

 

 

Night had long since come, but even the night sky seemed bleak, darkened by clouds. The mountains loomed close behind and more rose in the distance, but the plains surrounding them were nearly barren, and unwilling to leave Squall's side to go collect wood for a fire, Seifer stayed put, trying not to think about how the temperature was dropping. He mentally argued that it was at least good for Squall, who's fever still had not broken.

 

In the distance Seifer heard the sound of thunder and the wind seemed to pick up. He repressed a sigh. _Just great._ However, as the wind only continued to grow in strength, Seifer realized something was going on, and struggling to his feet tried to cover his face as out of the darkened sky a familiar, giant red ship made landfall, kicking up a small dust-storm in the process.

 

Seifer let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, both physically and mentally. _Finally._

 

He supposed it was irony really. He'd spent the majority of the trip feeling dread at the idea of facing familiar faces, and now here he was, tired and relieved to see them.

 

…of course, they didn't appear relieved to see him.

 

Several SEED Seifer didn't recognize first marched out from the lowered loading ramp, guns already ready and pointed on him, and he rolled his eyes as he held up his hands, showing he was unarmed. Moving quickly behind them was a stressed-looking Trepe and worried Kadowaki. Kadowaki nodded to Seifer before passing by him, kneeling down beside Squall with a medical bag ready. Seifer turned his attention to Quistis, who had her arms crossed in front of her chest, gaze flickering from Seifer to Squall's body. Seifer spoke first.

 

“There was no need to roll out the red carpet for me, Trepe.” Quistis raised an eyebrow, not moving to tell any of the armed SEED to lower their weapons.

 

“There was every reason, Seifer. You disappeared off the radar for years, then all of the sudden Rinoa disappears, Squall soon after...and then Rinoa ends up dead and Squall _near_ death, with only _you_ around?”

 

Seifer glared. “...I think you're forgetting who called for help.”

 

“Squall could have hit 'dial' before I picked up...we all know how much can change within thirty seconds with you.”

 

“Trepe, I thought you were smarter than this. Why would I call you here to save him if my end goal was to _kill_ him? How does that make any goddamn sense?” The determination on Quistis's face seemed to waver, and suddenly Seifer understood.

 

_...she's trying to act in Squall's stead._

 

“...even so, we can't take any chances.” Seifer glanced back to Kadowaki bent over Squall.

 

“...so what are you going to do then? Arrest me?”

 

“...if we have to, yes.” Seifer didn't even realize he was shaking, his head overflowing with too many different thoughts and feelings. He felt like punching someone or yelling or swearing even as fear started to climb up the back of his mind. He nearly jumped when a steady hand landed on his shoulder. He turned, looking into the concerned eyes of Kadowaki.

 

“I realize no one asked for the Doctor's take on all this, but personally I think it's ridiculous. Still, protocol is protocol, and I _do_ need to question you about what happened.” Kadowaki motioned for the medical team to get Squall and Rinoa's bodies onto stretchers. Seifer felt a little of the tension in his shoulders lessen.

 

“...is Leonhart...” Kadowaki bit her lip.

 

“...his fever is abnormally high and his heart appears to be struggling, but he's holding on. It's odd, considering he's in better shape than when he left, minus an arm injury.” The doctor raised an eyebrow at him. “...you may very well have the answer that will help save his life, so are you willing to surrender for now?” Looking down at her honest eyes, Seifer sighed, and unstrapping Hyperion from his back, handed it to the doctor.

 

“...lead the way.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of this chapter probably struck you as jarring. There was no real lead-in after all; you just got dumped in the middle of action. Unfortunately it needed to be that way-- what occurred before is going to come up later on, and for the sake of ~mystery~ I don't want to reveal too much too soon.  
> To be perfectly honest, I never liked Rinoa. She was one of the biggest complaints I had about FF8. But seeing as how this fic takes place in canon universe, I needed to do her death and the resulting grief that follows justice, so I hope it all works out.


	10. Awakening

It had been over three years since Seifer stood behind bars.

 

Three years ago he'd stood still, eyes forward, ready to face his fate (which he'd assumed would be the death sentence). Now he paced the small square cell, resisting the urge to punch the walls out of a chaotic mix of regret, anxiety, and rage. His hand twitched for the feel of Hyperion's hilt, a feeling that had soothed him in the past and which was now out of grasp. At least he got a small sense of pride from the way the guards were watching him like he was liable to explode at any minute even without his gunblade on hand.

 

The doors to the small prison slid open, and in came Dr. Kadowaki with Quistis following behind her. Seifer gazed at the doctor, refusing to get his hopes up.

 

“...any change?” Kadowaki shook her head tiredly.

 

“...he keeps going in and out of the fever. We've taken blood samples to screen for a virus, but nothing has shown up in the results.” Seifer bit back a curse, and instead focused his glare on the woman behind the doctor.

 

“...come to interrogate me then, Trepe?” Quistis frowned.

 

“...if you really want to help Squall like you say you do, then this should be less of an interrogation and more of a conversation, Seifer.” Seifer frowned, but admitted she had a point. Crossing his arms, he gazed flatly at her.

 

“...what do you want to know?” Quistis pushed the glasses up and crossed her arms.

 

“Let's start at the beginning. How did you and Squall end up meeting?” Seifer let out a dark laugh.

 

“Your precious Commander thought it wise to sneak out of Garden and go hunting for Rinoa on his own, and he was in such poor shape that some stray monsters ambushed him pretty bad outside the town I'd been living in.” Kadowaki turned to shoot a dark look at Quistis, telling Seifer all he needed to know.

 

_...they clearly knew his health was declining while he was here at Garden._

 

His blood boiled at the thought.

 

“Luckily some of the villagers found him soon after, and the village doctor was able to get Leonhart back on his feet, minus a broken rib that was mostly resistant to cure magic.” Kadowaki perked up.

 

“Where can we find this doctor? I'd like to get a look at the medical data-” Seifer shook his head, cutting Kadowaki off, and trying not to notice how it felt like his stomach dropped at the thought of Frostfall.

 

“Not possible. The village...burned to the ground.”

 

Seifer recounted Squall's healing progress, the hunt for the Kaavra (although he left out what happened between the two of them directly after), and the return to the destroyed village. Ignoring the pity he could feel in the heavy gazes of the two women, he continued on, only stopping the story once Ragnorok came into the picture. The silence between the three of them weighed heavy.

 

“Seifer, I'm-” Seifer glared at Quistis.

 

“Don't say you're sorry, Trepe. We all know those words won't do anything.” Seifer gripped the iron bars between his hands too tightly. “...we need to find him. Rinoa's killer. It...sounds crazy, but if there was a person that could cut down an entire village, it'd be him.” Kadowaki frowned.

 

“You said that he seemed to have powers of some sort, right?” Seifer nodded, taking his hands off the bars so he could cross his arms in front of his chest.

 

“...before we even reached the scene there was a large explosion. I doubt Rinoa was capable of doing that.” He frowned. “...and then there was the way the guy just vanished.” The doctor glanced to Quistis.

 

“...we should send a message to President Loire. See if Odine knows anything.” Quistis nodded.

 

“I agree.” She turned her eyes back to Seifer. “...thank you for cooperating. I know it's not in your nature.”

 

Seifer glared, frowning. “Didn't do it for you, Trepe.” Quistis rolled her eyes as she pulled out a mobile from her pocket, flipping it open. Seifer blinked.

 

“Oh wait-- hold on!” Quistis raised an eyebrow. “Squall was going to send you something on his-- a picture. He thought it might be important.” Looking intrigued, Trepe pulled out the mobile from her other pocket, and then after hesitating for a second, passed it through the bars to Seifer. It was Seifer's turn to raise an eyebrow.

 

Quistis huffed. “...I don't know his passcode.” Seifer felt a small sense of victory as he turned the device on and punched in Squall's passcode. He passed it back through the bars to Quistis and watched her pull up the picture.

 

A look, far too similar to the one Squall had made, crept over her face. She frowned.

 

“...it looks familiar. What is it?”

 

“...it was carved into a tree not too far from...the destroyed village. It wasn't there when we left, and it was near a meeting place between a friend and I. We think she may have carved it...maybe to point us in the direction of who attacked.” Quistis tilted her head, looking puzzled.

 

“...Squall didn't recognize it?” Seifer shook his head.

 

“He had the same reaction as you though.” Quistis flipped the mobile closed and put it back in her pocket.

 

“...if he recognized it too, then it's probably in a book we've both read. Probably something in a SEED manual. I'll look into it.”

 

Turning, heels clicking on the floor, Quistis disappeared back through the door she came from, leaving a heavy silence in the room as Seifer turned his gaze to Kadowaki, who was gazing at him with a slight frown. Seifer knew the doctor well enough to be able to tell the difference between a frown of disapproval and a frown of concern, and he could tell it was the latter.

 

“...doc?”

 

“How are you feeling Seifer? I was so busy checking on Commander Leonhart that I neglected to check on you.” Seifer shrugged.

 

“...tired and a bit sore, but that's pretty much it.”

 

“That's it?” Seifer nodded.

 

“Yeah.” Kadowaki raised an eyebrow.

 

“Seifer.” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Are you _sure_ you're okay?” Seifer sighed in frustration.

 

“Doc, if I _wasn't_ -”

 

“I would need to take you to the medical wing to check you since I don't have a medical kit with me.” Seifer blinked rapidly a few times, silent as the idea of what the doctor was getting at finally came together in his mind.

 

“Oh! Uh, well actually...” He tried not to grin. “...been a bit dizzy. I wonder if that beast did poison me after all...” Kadowaki sighed in a way that Seifer wasn't sure was real or fake, and turned to find one of the guards. In less than a minute he was walking through the prison doors behind Kadowaki.

 

“...thanks doc. I owe you one.” Kadowaki rolled her eyes.

 

“...with how many times I've patched you up Almasy, you owe me more than you could ever repay.” Seifer swallowed a laugh.

 

“...yes Ma'am.”

 

 

 

 

_Squall opened his eyes slowly._

_Sitting up, he took in his surroundings in confusion._

_He'd been lying in snow, yet he didn't feel cold. Raising his hand in front of his face, he flexed it. He watched it stretch, yet he couldn't feel it. It was almost like he was detached from his own body._

_Struggling to his feet, feeling incredibly off balance, he used the pine tree beside him to help him stand a bit more steadily. He couldn't feel the normal rough texture of the tree, just a sense that it was somewhat solid._

_Gazing out in front of him revealed very little about his surroundings. There was some sparse outlines of pine trees and the ground was blanketed in the snow he'd woken up in. He couldn't see more than a few feet in front of him due to a heavy fog. It was completely silent._

_“Hello?” He knew he called out-- could feel the word leave his throat, yet he couldn't hear it. It was like he'd been muted like a television program._

_He felt alone._

_However, as if to prove him wrong, a voice reached his ears._

_“Squall...”_

_He frowned. It sounded familiar._

_“...Squall...I'm sorry...” He knew this voice. Who was it?_

_“...I couldn't let him have it. And you can't either.”_

_Flashes of light—images-- began to flood his mind. Fire. Seifer. Plains. Clashing swords._

_His head began to ache._

_“...be careful Squall. Find the other Sorceresses. Save them.”_

_Pain. So much pain. Like he'd been stabbed through the chest._

_“...and...I love you.”_

_...Rinoa?_

_...RINOA!_

 

 

 

Squall Leonhart's eyes shot open as he sat up, gasping in pain. It was unbearably bright and the the room spun and the noise-- there was so much noise! Voices yelling, machines beeping, footsteps pounding like giants moving around him. It was chaos. He felt like he was on fire.

 

_Make it stop! MAKE IT ALL STOP!_

 

 

 

 

Seifer and Kadowaki had just made it to the walkway to the Infirmary when Seifer came to a complete stop, frozen in place, eyes wide. Goosebumps shot up his body.

 

_...this feeling..._

 

Just as Kadowaki paused to turn to him, several medical assistants came running out of the infirmary in a panic as a familiar scream echoed down the corridor. Kadowaki grabbed a hold of one of them.

 

“What's going on?!” The girl was shaking.

 

“...Commander Leonhart woke up, but he's...something's wrong with him!”

 

Even as his mind screamed at him to stop and stay back, Seifer found himself running quickly to the infirmary, heart pounding in his ears, Kadowaki following close behind him.

 

The sight in front of him made him freeze on the spot.

 

Squall was curled up on the bed, holding his head between his hands as if trying to block out hearing something and shaking. The room was freezing-- chilled enough that ice was beginning to form on the floor and Seifer could see his breath appear in puffs of air in front of him. Kadowaki, who stood next to him went to move forward, and springing into action Seifer grabbed hold of her and spun her back.

 

“Doc, no-!” Icicles shot forward, melting as they made contact with a shield of heat Ifrit had quickly wrapped around the two of them. Seifer gulped.

 

_...is that...?_ He could feel Ifrit's growling contempt as the guardian force replied,

 

“ _Yes...that's sorceress magic.”_

 

Seifer, trusting Ifrit to watch his back, turned to face the pale doctor.

 

“Doc, you need to get Edea here at once.” She looked like she had a thousand questions, but instead she nodded and hurried off, reminding Seifer of another reason he liked the doctor so much-- she could prioritize.

 

Turning to face the curled up figure of Squall once again, Seifer frowned.

 

 

_...how well can you shield me, Ifrit?_

 

“ _...well enough. He is overwhelmed-- he has little control over his magic. We should be able to get close.”_ Nodding, Seifer reached over to his right carefully, pulling open a drawer slowly and taking out a syringe full of sleep solution.

 

Slowly Seifer made his way forward towards Squall, noting with concern that with every step closer the temperature was dropping. By the time he was by the commander's side it was becoming difficult to move his feet. He grit his teeth and offered up a quick prayer that along with his sudden sorceress powers Squall also hadn't gained an immunity to the sleep solution, and then without warning, stabbed the needle into Squall's neck, making sure to empty the entire syringe.

 

Squall's eyelids began to droop, then fluttered closed as he slumped sideways, Seifer catching him just before he pitched over the side of the medical bed. Instantly warmth began to seep back into his veins, despite the inward chill he felt looking down at Squall's now-peaceful face.

 

_...how?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I originally had the idea for this fic, I had in mind three big surprises. Burning down Seifer's village was the first. Squall with sorceress powers was the second. I'll let you guys guess at the third. ;)
> 
> I have a real weakness for Kadowaki. She always gave off the vibe of a 'Matron to the cadets' to me, and clearly she's seen everyone grow up and go through the horror of war (especially war between fellow cadets). I think in that respect that she, more than most, would see and understand the ways Seifer has changed and hasn't.
> 
> I hope no one is put off by the twist of Squall gaining sorceress status. I realize it is used a lot, and without knowing the direction the fic is going it may seem like blatant disregard of the universe's laws.
> 
> Thank you for sticking by this fic...I can't believe how one small idea has already grown so big!


	11. No Words

 

The conference room they all sat in was uncomfortably silent. Even Tilmitt was quiet, her trademark easy-going grin replaced by a half-frown. It occurred to Seifer briefly that he was sitting in a room full of people that had attempted to kill him the last time they'd met on the battlefield, but then again, he'd been trying to kill them as well. He mentally shrugged. _War is war._ He did his best to ignore the way the cowboy and chicken-wuss continuously threw dark looks in his direction, but he did have to admit a part of him was irked by it. As he opened his mouth to say something, the metal doors to the conference room slid open, revealing a stressed Quistis and worried Kadowaki.

 

Plopping down into the chair beside Seifer, Quistis rubbed at her eyes, and the shadowed bags underneath them did not escape Seifer's notice. _Maybe now she understands what they've been putting Squall through..._

 

“I spoke with Matron-- she'll be ready to be picked up in about an hour.” She sighed. “...Selphie, would you-?”

 

“Of course!” Though lacking the normal energy behind it, the petite girl's response still held a solid level of cheer.

 

Irvine glanced back towards the doctor. “How's the Commander?”

 

“I had him put in a separate, private room after Seifer suggested it was sensory overload. His vitals are stable and hasn't woken just yet, but the sleeping solution should wear off soon. I have a nurse making sure no one attempts to enter.” Irvine nodded, and with a raised eyebrow turned to ask Seifer something when Quistis interrupted,

 

“Irvine. Zell. What are the students saying?” Zell stretched his arms out behind his head.

 

“They think the stress from his 'mission' and grief from losing Rinoa caused him to meltdown.” Irvine shook his head.

 

“...they're not wrong, I suppose. They're...just missing an element to it.” Zell crossed his arms, frowning.

 

“...can't really blame them. I mean...it doesn't make sense! Can we really be so sure about this?” Seifer closed his eyes, rubbing at his face tiredly.

 

“...I'm sure.”

 

Silence. Then,

 

“...can anyone explain why he's here anyway?” Seifer shot Zell a murderous look but it was Kadowaki that spoke up.

 

“He's here because he saved the Commander's life twice now-- possibly even three times if you consider how bad that situation earlier could have become.” Zell made a fist.

 

“And we're just supposed to believe what he says like that?” Quistis shook her head.

 

“If you don't believe him, you can ask Squall about it once he's properly awake. As it is, Seifer has proven himself to at least not be an immediate threat. And as for...Squall's new powers...well, he's the only one who has had some...closer experience with it.”

 

Seifer tried not to visibly wince as he glanced down at where his nails had pierced the inside of his palm from his tightly closed fists and had started to bleed. He jumped a little as he felt a hand on his shoulder, but relaxed a little when he looked up to see it was just the doctor.

 

“Indeed. For that reason, I believe it's best that Almasy stays with me in the infirmary for the time being. That way if another situation arises he can be of immediate assistance, and he'll be out of the way of the students. The last thing we need right now is more unnecessary chaos to erupt.” Quistis nodded.

 

“I agree.”

 

“We'll head back to the infirmary then. If there's any changes, I'll notify you immediately.” Putting his hands in his coat pockets, Seifer stood up, glaring at Zell as he followed Kadowaki out of the room. The walk to the infirmary was silent, but when they arrived, Kadowaki turned and frowned.

 

“Show me your hands.” Seifer frowned, looking to the side.

 

“It's nothing-”

 

“Almasy. Show me your hands.” Pouting, Seifer held them up to her. Sighing, the older women grabbed a nearby roll of bandage and started wrapping the self-inflicted wounds.

 

“I know you're concerned for the Commander's well-being.” Seifer opened his mouth, but the doctor continued, “-but I know this was done out of fear of something else.” Seifer's hands gave an involuntary tremor, betraying his purposefully blank expression.

 

“I've been through two wars now. I know the effects war can have on soldiers, both physically and mentally. And I know how hesitent said soldiers can be about seeking help, let alone admitting that they need it.” Kadowaki turned her gaze to Seifer's face, eyes focusing on the scar trailing down his forehead. “So let me be blunt about this, Seifer Almasy. If you don't do something about this, you will only hinder Commander Leonhart further.” Seifer gritted his teeth in frustration.

 

“You don't know what it was like! What she-- What I...”

 

Seifer knew she was right, deep down. The panic that had flooded his veins when he'd sensed the familiar feeling of sorceress magic-- like static in the air-- was evidence enough that he could very well be a liability. He brought one of his bandaged hands up to rub at his eyes.

 

_...and that's only the tip of the iceberg of how seriously fucked up I am from everything...dammit!_

 

Kadowaki took hold of his hand and pulled it back down so she could look him in the eyes.

 

“...just consider it for now, Seifer. As it is, I'm busy enough right now with this one.” She motioned towards the door to Squall's room. Seifer nodded.

 

“...alright.”

 

 

 

The next hour passed by slowly. Seifer split up his time between refilling and organizing supplies for the doctor and occasionally checking up on Squall. Personnel had been restricted so as to keep word of Seifer's whereabouts on the down-low, so only the nurse aids that were already stationed remained in the infirmary, occasionally glancing over at Seifer distrustfully. After another twenty minutes passed the phone on the wall rang, and Kadowaki picked it up quickly.

 

“Infirmary.” A pause. “Okay.” Another pause in which Kadowaki's eyes glanced over to Seifer, who was watching. “I'll let him know. Thanks.” Hanging up the phone, Kadowaki sighed and turned to gaze at Seifer.

 

“Edea Kramer should be arriving in twenty minutes. Quistis says that she would prefer you not be in the same room as her until an official announcement is made about your presence here in Garden. She had your old room reopened and says the code is the same as you left it.”

 

Seifer nodded. He'd probably be more irritated at Trepe except that he honestly didn't want to be in the same room as Matron either. _...I'm just not ready to have that conversation yet._

 

“I'll head over there then.” Casting one last look at the door to Squall's room, he turned and exited the infirmary, wondering if he'd actually be able to sleep.

 

 

 

 

Groaning, Squall opened his eyes slowly. His body felt heavy, but his head felt uncomfortably light-- almost like it'd spin right off if he moved to quick. He could make out two figure standing nearby.

 

“...Seifer?” _No...something's not right..._ He blinked as his eyes focused on the ceiling above him. “...where am I?” One of the figures stepped forward lightly, placing a hand on his forhead, smooth and cool against his heated skin. It was comforting-- nostalgic.

 

“You're back in Garden, Squall.” As his vision cleared, Squall realized it was Matron hovering above him.

 

“Matron...why are you here?” The other figure stepped forward hesitantly-- Quistis.

 

“...Squall, do you remember how you got here?” Squall frowned and closed his eyes.

 

“...was with Seifer. We were heading to Esthar...when...” Pain shot through his head as the memories began to flash back-- Rinoa smiling at him as the sword pierced through her chest, the pure pain and agony that overwhelmed him after, and the dream... He winced, gritting his teeth and reaching for his injured arm. When he opened his eyes and gazed at Quistis, his vision was clear.

 

“...whoever that guy was, was after her sorceress powers.” He looked to the side, frowning. Edea placed a hand under his chin, forcing him to gaze up at her.

 

“Son, how do you know that?” Squall closed his eyes-- focused on his breathing.

 

“...Rinoa told me. She spoke to me in a dream after I...passed out, or whatever happened. She said he's targeting the sorceresses.” He opened his eyes, gazing directly into Edea's. “...he must have had a way to capture hers after he killed her.” Edea sat down on the bed beside Squall, taking his hands into hers in a motherly gesture.

 

 _...she must think I'm grieving._ He knew he probably should be. Or at least attempting to process it.

 

“Squall...” She squeezed his hands. “...he didn't capture her powers.” Confused, Squall raised an eyebrow.

 

“How could you know that? Did you already find a new sorceress?” Edea continued to gaze into his face.

 

“...he didn't get them because Rinoa passed them on to you.” There was a moment of silence.

 

“...that...doesn't work...” Squall shook his head. “...sorceresses can only be women.” Edea shook her head.

 

“...that was the case until yesterday.” Squall opened his mouth, but she continued, “Search yourself Squall. Even ask the GF you have equipped. You'll see that it's there.” Frowning, Squall closed his eyes.

 

_Shiva?_

 

Nothing. Squall tried to focus on the feeling on his GF's presence-- something he hadn't had to do in a long time because of their strong bond.

 

_...Shiva?_

 

Fainter than normal, Shiva's voice drifted through his mind.

 

 _I am here Child, but it is hard to hear you through the magic._ His eyes shot open and he gasped as a foreign feeling began to grow in his veins-- warm and heavy. _It's not possible...I can't be...I don't want-_

 

“Squall.” When his eyes turned quickly to Matron who had placed both hands on his shoulders, he noticed the visible puffs of air coming from their mouths. _It's...cold?_ Matron placed a hand on his cheek, cold to the touch. “Squall, you need to reign in your emotions. They're connected to your new magic, and if you lose control of one you lose control of the other.”

 

Squall opened and closed his mouth, knowing he needed to ask something but not knowing what it was he needed to ask. Matron seemed to understand.

 

“...we'll work on this together. For now, you need to ask your GF to help you keep the magic under control.” Shiva, who was listening, responded weakly in the back of his mind,

 

 _I will try and do what I can, Child._ Squall nodded, gazing down at his hands which had tightened to fists.

 

“...she's going to try.” Leaning forward, Matron kissed him on the forehead.

 

“...it won't be easy Squall, but I know you well enough to know that you can handle it. For now, I want you to get some rest. Quistis is doing a fine job running things for now, so leave the work to her. Once you're back on your feet and healthy, we'll start your training.” Squall nodded.

 

“...alright.” With that Matron left the room, leaving just Quistis gazing down at him in concern.

 

“Seifer has already filled me in on all the details of what has been going on the past two months. We're going to have a long talk once you're out of the infirmary and back on your feet.” Squall sighed and leaned back.

 

“Is Seifer here?” Quistis nodded, frowning. “...I wasn't sure what to do with him. We had him in the jail for a little, but he cooperated and...helped out a bit, so Kadowaki was keeping an eye on him up until an hour ago. He's in his room now. We'll discuss what to do with him once you're better.” Reaching into her pocket, Quistis pulled out and handed Squall his mobile. “...get some rest. If you need anything, just call.” With that, his second-in-command walked out of the room, and sighing, Squall laid back down and closed his eyes.

 

 

 

 

Seifer couldn't sleep.

 

There was no logical reason as to why he shouldn't be able to sleep. He was still recovering from injuries, exhausted from battle and traveling, mentally exhausted from being back in Garden and the situation with Squall...and yet he couldn't manage to knock out. It was like he was missing something. He was just considering giving up and finding a book when there was a quiet knock on the door to his room. Frowning, he got up and walking over, hit the button to open the door.

 

When his eyes took in the exhausted looking figure of Squall Leonhart, it all clicked into place.

 

After all, the last two months he'd never gone to sleep in an empty house.

 

No words needed to be spoken between the two of them. Seifer stepped to the side to let his rival in, and once Leonhart had laid down on the bed, Seifer joined him, wrapping the other man in his arms tightly, Squall's head pressed into his chest. All he could do was hold him as the other man's body spasmed and the front of Seifer's shirt dampened from what he was sure were tears. Seifer knew by now that no words could heal a wound caused by death.

 

Eventually Squall's body seemed to relax and his breathing evened out. Gazing down at the sleeping brunet, Seifer felt his own eyes falling shut as a sense of calm washed over him for the first time in a long time.


	12. Different

 Chapter 12: Different

 

Groaning, Seifer rolled over, trying to bury his head further into the pillow as the annoying, piercing sound floated up from somewhere below. _...why the fuck would I set an alarm?_ When the sound paused momentarily and he was preparing to go back to sleep, it started right back up, and growling slightly, Seifer opened his eyes and reached down, feeling around on the floor until he found the source of the noise-- Squall's mobile.

 

_...so much for letting him rest._ Rolling over, Seifer took a few seconds to take in the peaceful face of a sleeping Squall Leonhart before reaching out and shaking him slightly.

 

“...Squall. Wake up.” Squall's eyes didn't open, but grumbling slightly, the man shifted, pressing his face against Seifer's chest.

 

“...no.” Seifer chuckled and couldn't help but reach up and stroke his hand through Squall's hair.

 

“...your mobile is going off.” If Seifer didn't have a feeling that Squall probably snuck out of the infirmary last night without permission he'd have just turned the thing off, but as it was, he really didn't want anyone breaking down his door in a search for the missing Commander-turned-sorceress.

 

Squall sighed, and rolling over onto his back, turned to gaze at Seifer, who held out the mobile for Squall to take. Flipping it open, the commander brought it to his ear as he brought his other hand to trace the scar on his forehead-- an obvious sign of annoyance.

 

“What is it?” Some silence and the faint sound of what was probably Quistis's voice. “No, I'm fine.” Quistis's voice seemed to get a little louder and Squall closed his eyes, frowning. “No one said I had to stay there, only that I needed to get some rest.” Squall sighed. “I'm fine. I'm with Seifer. Do you actually need anything?” Sitting up, Squall nodded. “Yeah. Sounds good.” Snapping the mobile shut, he took a deep breath and turned back to gaze at Seifer, who raised an eyebrow at him, smirking.

 

“Trepe try to ground you for sneaking out to see me?” Squall rolled his eyes, snorting.

 

“You can't blame her for wanting to make sure I didn't run off again in the middle of the night.” Seifer tilted his head, suddenly curious.

 

“...is that what happened last time?” Squall shrugged.

 

“More or less. No one was going to question the Commander for going out for a 'night stroll'.” Shaking his head, Squall stretched. “She wants me to check back in with Kadowaki and then if I feel up to it, meet up with the others later in the afternoon to fill them in...on everything.” He turned to gaze at Seifer. Sitting up, Seifer tried to squish the anxiety that he felt building up as he returned the gaze.

 

“I...think we should talk.” Squall raised an eyebrow.

 

“About what?” Seifer ran a hand through his hair tiredly.

 

“About...this. Us. What happened before...” He couldn't quite get the words ' _before Frostfall burned'_ out of his mouth. Squall nodded.

 

“Alright.” Seifer took a deep breath, closing his eyes briefly before opening them to look into Squall's.

 

“...what do you want from me, Squall?” Squall bit his bottom lip, fidgeting slightly before answering quietly,

 

“...I don't want you to leave.” Seifer reached out shakily, bringing one hand under Squall's chin to force the commander to look him in the eyes.

 

“...is that it?” Squall gazed back.

 

“...no.” Seifer let his hand drop to the side, wincing when he without thinking made a fist and touched the wounds still fresh from yesterday's anxiety.

 

“Squall...I tried to kill your friends. I... _tortured_ you.” Getting the word out what hard and Seifer's stomach turned saying it.

 

Squall didn't even blink. “It was war.” Seifer closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.

  

“Hyne Squall...I'm a murderer! A war criminal. I'm...I'm-!” Countless words floated through his head-- words that hadn't left him for the past three years, even in the hills of Frostfall-- _Damaged. Broken beyond repair. Worthless. Scum._

 

_...you shouldn't want me. No one should._

 

Only when he felt Squall's thumb brush against his cheek did Seifer realize there was water on his face. Squall leaned forward, holding his face with both hands.

 

“Almasy, I think you've forgotten who I am.” Seifer raised an eyebrow, and Squall raised one back, mimicking him.

 

“I'm the Commander of Balamb Garden-- a school that _trains_ children to become mercenaries. Mercenaries that can become anything from soldiers of war to assassins, depending on the request and the amount of money involved. You and I both went through Garden together, and we _both_ took part in the War and killed, even if we were on opposite sides. We weren't brought up on morals; we were brought up on _duty_.” Squall brought his face forward, leaning in so that their foreheads touched.

 

“...how you feel about yourself, Seifer, doesn't change how _I_ feel about _you._ ” Seifer gulped.

 

“...are you sure about this? What about Rinoa?” Squall shook his head slightly.

 

“...I loved Rinoa. But that feeling...it was built on our connection as Sorceress and Knight. Rinoa...feltmore for me than I ever felt for her. She wanted more...than I could give her. I...didn't want her the way she wanted me to.” Seifer let out a shaky breath.

 

“... _me_ though?” Squall closed his eyes briefly, and when he opened them again the almost hungry look reflecting back in them shot heat all the way down Seifer's body.

 

“I want you, Seifer.”

 

_Holy Hyne-  
_

  

Seifer reached up, carding his hand through Squall's hair and pulling him forward so their lips crashed together, moving against each other hungrily, Squall letting out a moan that shot through Seifer's body like lightning. Squall's hands were drifting along his body, exploring, and the only thing that kept Seifer from getting completely lost in the moment was that suddenly he felt goosebumps on his skin from a chill, and as he considered laying them back down so they could get under the blanket he realized it was morning and it _shouldn't be getting colder it should be getting warmer_...

 

Breaking the kiss, Seifer pulled back and gazed at Squall in concern, ignoring the sudden anxiety spike in his gut.

 

“Squall.” Squall opened his eyes, confused.

 

“...what? Why-” Seifer winced. _...if I tell him he's losing control of his magic, he might panic..._

 

“...just breathe. Focus on your breathing for a minute.” Squall raised an eyebrow, but without questioning it out-loud did as Seifer asked, and Seifer felt slight relief as the temperature of the room began to rise. Placing his hands on Squall's shoulders, Squall opened his eyes to gaze at him in concern.

 

“...did I do something wrong?” Seifer chuckled, and leaning forward, brought his lips to Squall's forehead.

 

“...no. But you're still recovering. Let's...just take this a bit slower for a while, okay?” Squall raised an eyebrow, but nodded after a moment.

 

“...alright.”

 

The forgotten mobile on the bed pinged, making the two of them jump in surprise. Squall rubbed at his forehead.

 

“Right...gotta check in with Kadowaki.” He sighed. As Seifer opened his mouth to respond, a loud growling noise came from Squall's stomach and Seifer could have sworn he saw a blush form on the commander's face. Seifer laughed.

 

“...how about you go have your check up and then we get some breakfast?”

 

 

 

 

“Well, everything seems fine. I'd say you're mostly recovered.” Kadowaki pulled the sensors off of Squall's chest and placed them back below the monitor as the commander pulled his shirt back on. Seifer forcefully turned his attention to the doctor.

 

“Is there anything he needs to do?” Kadowaki shook her head. “Just make sure he gets some decent rest and eats.” Standing up, Squall frowned at the two of them.

 

“...I'm right here.” Seifer snickered.

 

“...yeah but we both know how well you take care of yourself, Princess.” Squall shot him a dark look before turning and leaving the room, leaving Seifer to hurry after him, laughing. Kadowaki sighed and shook her head.

 

“...some things never change.”

 

 

 

 

As they sat in the cafeteria eating breakfast, Seifer did his best to ignore the few stares he could feel coming from the small amount of cadets that were sitting around eating late. He tried to tell himself it could have been way worse if they'd come to eat at a normal hour. It simply hadn't crossed Squall's mind yet that there hadn't been an official statement made on exactly why Seifer was back at Garden. Of course, there was another problem.

 

Squall was scrolling through his mobile with one hand, holding a piece of toast with another, and a frown marred his face. Seifer raised an eyebrow, noticing that the toast in Squall's hand was starting to look a little less toasted and more and more frosted.

 

“...what are you looking at?” Squall sighed.

 

“...well, I was without mobile service for nearly two months. The twenty plus missed calls from Quistis and the others make sense, but...” He bit his bottom lip, dropping the toast back onto his plate tiredly. “...over a hundred emails from Laguna is ridiculous...” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“Laguna? Who's that?” The name did sound familiar...

 

“...the President of Esthar.” Seifer nodded.

 

“Didn't realize Balamb Garden was so cozy with Esthar. Guess it makes sense though.” Seifer took a sip of his orange juice, watching Squall's frown turn into a slight grimace in curiosity.

 

“...well...he's also my father.” Seifer came so close to shooting orange juice through his nose that his face sort of hurt as he choked it down. 

 

“Uh, what?” Squall rubbed at his forehead tiredly.

 

“Yeah...it's a long story. When I get back to my office, I'll let you read the file.” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“...am I allowed to do that? I'm not exactly SEED.” Squall sighed.

 

“Shut up and eat, Seifer.” Remembering suddenly the toast, Seifer quickly swapped their slices, taking the icy one and dropping his onto Squall's plate. Squall raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth to likely ask what Seifer was thinking, so seeing an opportunity, Seifer grabbed up the toast and stuffed it into his rival's open mouth.

 

“Eat.” Glaring at him, Squall did as he asked. Seifer rolled his eyes as he called out to Ifrit,

 

_...mind lending me a hand?_ The fire demon grumbled but the toast in his hand began to warm up and after a couple of second was back to room temperature.

 

_...don't make a habit of this Almasy._ Seifer chuckled leaving Squall to glance up at him, confused. Seifer shrugged.

 

“It's nothing.”

 

 

 

 

It was four in the afternoon when they all convened around the conference room table once again, this time Squall and Matron also being in attendance-- Matron to Squall's left, Seifer to Squall's right. The tension in the room was uncomfortably thick. Finally Quistis cleared her throat and got the meeting going.

 

“Squall...tell us what happened the past two months.” Squall closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

 

“...Rinoa and I...got in a verbal argument. I...could have said things better. It upset her and she ran away.” Irvine piped right up.

 

“What was the argument about?” Squall rubbed at his scar tiredly.

 

“Our...relationship.” Selphie gasped.

 

“What happened?!” Squall groaned and put his face in his hands. Seifer crossed his arms and rolled his eyes at the young girl.

 

“What do you think happened, Tilmitt? They broke up!”

 

“What?!”

 

“Oh damn”

 

“Dude...”

 

Seifer sighed inwardly. _Man, they really must have been blinded by the stereotypical “fairy-tale romance” vibe..._

 

Irvine cleared his throat. “Anyway...moving on...?” Sitting up, Squall sighed.

 

“...I spent the next few days reaching out to people, seeing if she'd run to one of her familiar haunts.Nothing. The only area that I didn't cover was the Trabian wilderness. I...didn't want rumors to spread about her missing...and I didn't want to get others involved, so I went out to track her down myself.” Quistis shook her head angrily.

 

“That was dumb Squall, even for you.” Squall sent a glare in her direction before continuing.

 

“...unfortunately I wasn't in the best condition, and some monsters got the better of me. It happened to be right outside of Frostfall, the village Seifer was living in. The doctor there patched me up as best he could, but I seem to have grown a slight resistance to cure magic, so I ended up having to wait for my body to naturally mend. Seifer was kind enough to house me until I was well enough to start using my gunblade again.” Zell snorted and looked like he was about to say something but the icy glare he got from Squall seemed to be enough to stop him short of speaking.

 

“While I was there, a monster managed to kidnap and run off with a child into the woods. Seifer and I went to go rescue them...but it was too late. We fought the monster but I ended up injured...again.” Squall looked slightly ashamed. “...Seifer patched me up and we headed back to the town...only to find it destroyed and almost everyone murdered.”

 

His friends gasped, looking horrified.

 

“...the only person we know that may have survived is a young girl named Anna. She left Seifer a sign that she'd escaped, and below that she left us this mark, which we think is a hint at who destroyed the village...and perhaps who later killed Rinoa.”

 

Squall held up a blown-up, printed picture of the mark carved into the tree. Seifer gazed at everyone's faces, but none lit up in recognition.

 

“...Quistis and I have definitely seen it before, but we can't figure out where from. I'll contact Ellone later to see if she can find it anywhere in Esthar's records.” The others nodded and Squall placed the picture down.

 

“...after what happened in Frostfall, we decided to head to Esthar. My plan was to report what happened to Laguna and see if anything similar had happened in the area. However...” Squall seemed to hesitate, and when Seifer reached out and took his hand underneath the table, he gripped it tightly.

 

“On our way through the plains, we saw smoke. I...could sense it was Rinoa...and that she was in danger. We hurried but...by the time we got there...” Squall seemed to lose his voice and squeezed Seifer's hand. Getting the message, Seifer continued,

  

“...she was fighting with a cloaked figure. The voice sounded masculine. He ran her through with a sword. Leonhart reacted like he'd also been stabbed and passed out. When I tried to rush the figure, he...vanished, like an illusion. That's why I used Leonhart's mobile to call Trepe to come.”

 

There was silence as the group attempted to take it all in. It was finally Zell that spoke up.

 

“...so then, when you passed out...” Edea nodded, finally speaking up.

 

“Yes...that's when Rinoa's powers must have transferred to Squall.” Irvine frowned, crossing his arms.

 

“...so who was the guy that killed her? You said he seemed like he had powers too, right? So...was he a knight? Or are male sorceresses the new thing?” Matron shook her head.

 

“...I am not aware of any. I didn't even think it possible until now.”

 

“What's this guy's goal anyway?” Zell asked. Squall frowned darkly.

 

“...when I was still recovering in the infirmary, I had a dream...Rinoa spoke to me in it. She said the other sorceresses are in danger-- that's he's after them.” Selphie spoke up.

 

“...but it was a dream, right?” Edea laced her fingers together on the table, frowning.

 

“...it is possible it was just a dream. But it's also possible that when she transferred her powers to Squall, Rinoa was also able to transfer...a final message of sorts. I don't think we should rule out this possibility.” Quistis nodded and turned to Squall.

 

“...so what's the plan then?” Squall rubbed at his forehead, feeling a headache coming on.

 

“...for now we need to research the symbol and we need to start locating sorceresses. It's entirely possible they may have already come into contact with him and know more than we do.” The group nodded.

 

Zell glanced over towards Seifer. “...and what about him?” Squall raised an eyebrow at Zell.

 

“What about him?” Seifer tried not to let a smirk grow on his face.

 

“...well, are we just going to let him wander around garden like he's an actual SEED?” Seifer opened his mouth to retort angrily but shut it when he felt Squall place a hand on his thigh.

 

“I'll make an announcement so that this is clear to everyone-- Seifer is here to help us track down Rinoa's killer and the murderer of Frostfall village. He has every right to be here helping out, and as such will be treated with the respect a guest at Garden rightfully deserves.” The glare Squall was sending across the table was even more threatening with the way the temperature in the room had suddenly dropped.

 

Matron placed a hand on Squall's shoulder, smiling lightly at him. “Squall dear-- breathe.” Squall raised an eyebrow, but did as asked.

 

_...why is everyone telling me to breathe today? Do I just look like I'm getting worked up or something?_ After a couple of seconds he reopened his eyes, and Edea squeezed his shoulder lightly.

 

“Good. Now, if this meeting is adjourned, I wish to speak to you and Seifer about something.” Squall nodded, not noticing the uncomfortable look Seifer had on his face at hearing those words. Taking one last look around the table as he stood up, Squall said quietly,

 

“...if you come across anything important, report to me immediately.” The others saluted and watched the three leave. Once they were out of the room, the silence was broken by Selphie.

 

“...there's something different about them.” Zell snorted.

  

“Yeah Selph...they're not fighting. Haven't seen them get along this well since the SEED exam.” Selphie giggled and shook her head.

 

“You're right, but that's not what I mean.” Irvine nodded, stretching his arms back behind his head.

 

“My little lady is right. There's definitely a different feeling about those two.” Quistis shrugged, folding her arms in front of her chest.

 

“...well, they have been through a lot the past two months.”

 

Kadowaki remained silent, watching the remaining group try to puzzle out what the difference was. She almost laughed.

 

 

 

 

 

“We'll need to start your training soon.” Squall nodded, walking beside Matron down the hallway towards the elevator.

 

“When would be best for you Matron?” Matron frowned.

 

“...it's best to start it before you develop some bad habits, however...” She glanced back at Seifer, who was trailing behind them with his eyes downcast. “...I could use some help tidying up the Orphanage first. I was thinking perhaps Seifer could come and help?” Seifer looked up in surprise as the two turned to gaze at him.

 

“Uhh...” He frowned. _I...don't really have an excuse not to... And...it's probably best that I get past...this...whatever this is... And maybe the manual labor will do me some good._ “Okay...sure.” Matron smiled, and Seifer had the weird feeling of his heart both growing and sinking.

 

“Selphie will be flying me back in two hours.” Seifer nodded and watched Edea walk off before turning his attention to Squall beside him.

 

“We should go get you packed up then.” Seifer grimaced.

 

“I...don't have much. Most of my stuff burned up.” Squall shook his head.

 

“...you spent a few hours in your old room and you didn't even bother to look in the wardrobe?” He snorted. “...when you ran off, they never opened up your room. Garden was too much of a mess to admit new cadets, and then when I took over...” Squall shrugged. “...just didn't feel right.” Seifer raised an eyebrow, smirking.

 

“...so my porn collection is still there?...Oww!” he rubbed at the spot where Squall had punched his shoulder and laughed. “Joking, Squally...” Squall started walking off without him.

 

“...whatever.”

 


	13. Scars

**Chapter 13: Scars**

 

Seifer swallowed dryly, gazing up at the massive red ship he would be boarding in a minute. His right hand reached down to trace the hilt of Hyperion. _At least I got my gunblade back._ A hand landed on his shoulder and startled he jumped slightly. Squall removed his hand, gazing at Seifer with visible concern.

 

“...are you going to be alright? You don't have to go-- we could easily send Irvine or Zell.” Seifer shook his head.

 

“No. I'll be fine. It's...” He frowned. “Well, it's long overdue now.” Squall nodded, stepping up so that they were shoulder to shoulder.

 

“If you need me for anything, just use Matron's mobile to call. Otherwise, I'll see you in two days.” With that Squall walked off, and refusing to look back, Seifer hurried into the giant behemoth of a ship before Selphie could yell at him to hurry up.

 

<...............................>

 

Standing out in the flower field, gazing out at the familiar landscape that almost appeared unchanged from his childhood memories, Seifer almost felt like he'd fallen back through time...like he should expect to hear children in the distance playing and Matron yelling for them to come back for dinner. Only the sound of the sea breeze and waves in the distance met his ears. It all felt hollow...empty. A bit like he did, being back here. Seifer wasn't surprised when Cid walked up to stand beside him, also gazing out. Surprising himself, Seifer spoke first.

 

“...it hasn't changed much.” Cid shook his head.

 

“Much like us humans, the land doesn't really change unless it is forced to.” With his words images of fire engulfing Frostfall, and villages even before Frostfall, came to mind, but before he could become lost in the memories, Cid's hand on his shoulder pulled him back, and he gazed down at the headmaster with uncertainty. Cid gazed back unflinchingly.

 

“I've seen you change, Seifer. I saw you first as an unruly son, then as a troubled student, and then as a lost knight. And now I stand beside a man running from his past with his whole future ahead of him.” Cid raised an eyebrow. “...the only question is, how long can you keep running with that weight holding you back?” Patting his shoulder and smiling softly, Cid turned back towards the Orphanage, lightly glowing through the fog that was setting in over the fields.

 

“Come inside. Edea should have dinner ready.”

 

 

 

While it was still slightly uncomfortable, dinner wasn't quite as awkward as he'd expected it to be. Seifer hadn't realized how much he'd missed home-cooking (and tried to ignore the sharp pang when he realized the last real meal he'd been made was at the inn with Dolly), and Matron and Cid mostly talked about the Orphanage and the improvements they were making on it. Seifer knew they were treading around his triggers carefully-- part of him appreciated it and part of him was disgusted by the fact that part of him appreciated it.

 

“So what do you guys need help with?” Cid chuckled, placing his mug of coffee down.

 

“Manual labor, mostly. Unfortunately I'm at that age where I risk being bed-ridden for lifting a plank the wrong way. We're going to build a fence on the side of the building facing the field so we can form a backyard. Think you're up to that?” Seifer snorted.

 

“I built my own house-- I think I can handle a small fence.” Cid raised an eyebrow.

 

“You built a house?” Seifer smirked.

 

“Well, Frostfall was a small village so there weren't exactly houses on the market. They put me up at the inn at first, so when I wasn't out slaying monsters I was working on building my own house. Of course, I didn't have a lot of experience at it, but some of the elder villagers were willing to help me and give me pointers throughout the process.”

 

“That must have been difficult.” Seifer chuckled.

 

“It was pretty great, actually. Turns out I actually enjoy working with my hands. It's...relaxing. And getting to see it through start to finish...” Seifer didn't even realize he was smiling softly. “...it was pretty awesome.” Cid and Edea glanced at each other, smiling softly.

 

“Sounds like it was a good thing we chose you to help us out then.” Cid stood up, stretching and yawned. “We'll get right to it tomorrow morning then.” Standing up, Edea began to gather the dishes from the table.

 

“We've set up yours and Squall's old room for you two to stay in whenever you visit. Go get some rest.” Seifer nodded and tried to ignore the weird feeling he got in his gut hearing that.

 

“Okay. Goodnight.”

 

<...............................>

 

Stepping into the sunlight the following morning, Seifer closed his eyes, stretched, and breathed in the familiar scent of the sea-salt air, realizing for the first time in a while how much he'd missed seeing the ocean. Even the sound of the seagulls crying in the distance was oddly comforting. Turning to Cid who walked up beside him, he took the toolbox from the ex-headmaster's hand and raised an eyebrow.

 

“Alright-- show me what you have planned.”

 

As Cid walked him through the plans the concerns Seifer had been unable to get out of his head seemed to fade as he shifted his focus into getting an idea of what Cid wanted done and planning out how to achieve it. And as he started nailing the wood together and planting posts into the ground, he became so enthralled with the task that he didn't even realize it was noon until Matron came out with some lemonade and snacks for them to eat. Wiping sweat from his face and downing the cold drink, he listened attentively as Cid and Edea talked about their plans for the Orphanage, both maintenance-wise, and about the future residents. Later on in the evening alone Cid and Edea would remark to each other how they'd never seen such a natural smile grace Seifer's face before as when he stood there imagining the Orphanage's future.

 

By the time the sun was setting and the fog was rolling in they'd finished half of the fence.

 

“It's looking pretty good so far. We should be able to have it finished by tomorrow at this rate.” Cid noted cheerfully as Seifer enjoyed the slight swell of pride in his chest as he looked it over. They both turned as Edea called out the back door,

 

“Dinner is ready you two!”

 

As Seifer lay on the bed later that night, gazing up at the ceiling, his stomach full and his muscles sore, he drifted off thinking _...I could really get used to this._

 

<...............................>

 

The second day, just as late-afternoon rolled in, Seifer and Cid stood together and looked over the finished fence. Cid chuckled, smiling.

 

“I've got to say, Seifer, you've really got a talent when it comes to building.” Seifer stretched, smiling.

 

“So what's the next project?” Cid's smile faded a little.

 

“The next project will have to wait a bit. I need to call Squall and figure out what materials and supplies he'll be bringing with him tonight.” They started off towards the house. “Edea may need some help in the kitchen preparing for tonight however. You should ask.” Seifer nodded, his smile fading a bit too.

 

“Right...”

 

Opening the door, they both quickly took off their shoes and Edea came into the entryway, smiling at them, broom in hand.

 

“You two already finished the fence?” Seifer nodded and Cid chuckled, nudging Seifer with his elbow.

 

“We did indeed thanks to our master builder here.” Ignoring the way his cheeks felt warm, Seifer rubbed at the back of his head and rolled his eyes.

 

“Shut up, Cid...” Cid laughed, turning to Edea.

 

“I've got to go call Squall and see what he's bringing us tonight. He's yours to deal with now.”

 

“Hey!” Cid walked up the stairs, disappearing from view and Seifer sighed, turning his uncomfortable gaze to Matron's smiling face.

 

“I've already got dinner going, so why don't we have some tea?” Ignoring how his palms suddenly felt sweaty, Seifer nodded.

 

“...sure.”

 

 

 

They sat at the table, warm mugs in hand, gazing at their hands and each trying to find the right words. Edea spoke first, breaking the silence.

 

“...you're uncomfortable being around me, aren't you?” Seifer flinched, right hand reaching up to rub at the scar on his face. Across, from him, Matron smiled gently. “...it's alright, Seifer. I understand. After all...she was in my body-- she had my face.”

 

Seifer grit his teeth, left hand making a fist. “...it's...not alright to me. You were _Matron_ before she-- I know you're not--” He shook his head in frustration. “I don't want to feel this way!”

 

_I don't want to be scared of you._

 

_I don't want to hate you._

 

_I don't want to hate myself for failing you!_

 

He didn't know he was crying until Matron reached out and wiped at the tears escaping his eyes. His body went rigid and cold, but her hands were warm and Seifer forced himself to look her in the eyes-- search her eyes for any hint of Ultimecia in hopes that maybe he could put at least one fear to rest. Only the kind, loving eyes of the only mother-figure he'd had in his life stared back at him.

 

“Seifer...it's okay. And I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” He was shaking now, sobbing into her shoulder, but he couldn't feel it. Couldn't seem to feel anything. He didn't even realize that he'd begun to speak his thoughts aloud, over and over through too quick and too shallow breaths.

 

“I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I fucked up and I--! I couldn't-- I wasn't any good and--!” Edea continued to hold him close, comforting him even as inwardly her own heart felt like it was breaking, seeing one of her sons in such pain. _But..._ she thought to herself, ... _things have to get worse before they can get better._

 

Eventually Seifer's body began to relax and the tears thinned. Pulling away from Matron to wipe his eyes with his arm and take a deep breath, he tried to ignore the shame he felt over the part of him that she'd just seen. Instead, he spoke up, his voice coming out cracked-sounding.

 

“...this is why you _really_ asked me to come here, isn't it?” Matron half smiled, picking up and placing the tea in Seifer's still slightly-trembling hands.

 

 

“...that was one of the reasons, yes. The selfish reason.” Seifer took a sip of the peppermint tea, slightly raising his eyebrow.

 

“...there was another reason?” Edea nodded, her face suddenly looking a little more serious.

 

“Yes... It's about Squall.” Seifer frowned.

 

“...is he okay?” Matron took a sip of tea.

 

“He is...for now.” She frowned. “However...you must have sensed it when he first woke up. The sheer amount of magic he has.” Thinking back to when he'd first sensed Squall's power, Seifer tried to ignore a chill that went through his body.

 

“...I did.” Edea sighed.

 

“Squall is in a dangerous situation, because he has inherited the power of three different sorceresses, and all of that magic is contained within a body and mind that was not suited for holding it. Rinoa had that gift, and so she wasn't terribly affected by it, but the power was forced into Squall against its will, and thus it will be far more easy for it to escape him.” Seifer's mind flashed back to the frosty toast and the sudden temperature drops in the rooms Squall and he were in. He crossed his arms.

 

“...he can't control it well.” Edea nodded.

 

 

“So far, because he hasn't received any training or even knowledge on sorceress magic in general, his GF is doing the majority of the heavy lifting. But a GF's endurance can ony last so long, especially when the said GF is of the same element that the sorceress magic is.” Seifer took another sip from the mug.

 

“But you'll be training him starting tomorrow, right?” Edea nodded and turned her gaze to the table.

 

“Yes, I will. But...it won't be enough. He needs something else, Seifer.” Seifer had a feeling he knew where the conversation was going, and his body reacted to the thought, his heart beginning to race again and chills spreading out across his skin.

 

 _...she can't be..._ Edea gazed into his eyes steadily.

 

“He needs a Knight, Seifer. Someone he can trust to share his power with.”

 

_No._

 

_No...I can't-_

 

_You can't seriously expect me to-!_

 

_I won't go through that again!_

 

He wasn't sure what he wanted to do...get up and run? Yell? Pound his fist on the table? He put his face in his hands and rubbed at it, and taking a shaky breath, looked through his fingers at Matron.

 

“Okay...but why me? Why does it need to be me?”

 

Matron let go of the tea cup, instead placing one hand over the other resting on the table. “Well, that's simple.” Seifer crossed his arms, frowning.

 

“Is it really?”

 

“Quite.” Matron raised an eyebrow. “You're the only one that can keep Squall in check.” Seifer couldn't think of an argument against that.

 

“...oh.” He didn't really know what to say and ran his hand through his hair tiredly. Matron chuckled.

 

“You _know_ what an immovable force Squall is. Yet, even when he doesn't agree-- even when he _doesn't want to_ \-- Squall always hears you out, doesn't he? While he would gladly pay no mind to others, he's always noticed you.”

 

Seifer tried to ignore the warmth (and undoubtedly faint blush) on his cheeks as he replied,

 

“So? We've always been rivals.” Edea shook her head.

 

“It's more than that. When Squall calls upon magic, it will require all of his focus, and if it draws him in too deep, he will lose sight of everything else. Madness caused by uncontrollable addiction is common among Sorceresses, as you know.” Seifer flinched. “The role of the Sorceress's Knight is critical because it can stop that from happening.” Seifer glanced up.

 

“How?”

 

“Unlike other means of communicating, a Sorceress and their Knight can communicate _through_ the magic that has bonded them. Even with the magic drowning out their surroundings, the voice of their Knight can still be heard in their mind when nothing else gets through.”

 

Seifer winced, glancing down at his clenched fist where he'd managed to reopen the wounds from his nails earlier.

 

“...she...did that, to me. Sometimes...she spoke into my mind. Knew my thoughts without me speaking. But...I never...” Edea frowned, shaking her head sadly.

 

“The connection between a Sorceress and their Knight is meant to be a two-way street, but unfortunately it can be misused. I wish...you hadn't had to experience it like that.” Seifer closed his eyes. Focused on the feeling of his breathing.

 

“...I'm going to need time to think about all of this...” Matron reached across the table, placing a hand over his.

 

“Go ahead. Go on a walk-- clear your head. I have dinner under control just fine.” Nodding, Seifer got up and made his way to the front door, turning back for just a second before opening the door and stepping out.

 

<...............................>

 

Squall watched his ship take off, heading back to Garden, and then pulling his jacket tighter around him, turned his gaze to the horizon where the brilliant sunset cast a deep shade of red upon the ocean's surface. The eeriness of the image juxtaposed against the calming, nostalgic sound of the waves crashing upon the beach, and farther off against the breakwater, left goosebumps on Squall's skin. He knew he should turn and head towards the Orphanage, and yet...

 

_...a short walk on the beach won't get me grounded...anymore, anyway._

 

He walked in silence until the old lighthouse came into view, and he stopped short upon making out the figure of Seifer sitting against one of the small dunes, gazing out at the waves. It had only been two days, but Squall was even inwardly embarrassed to admit that he'd missed the blond's company. As if sensing his presence, jade-green eyes turned to gaze at him. What he saw in those eyes unsettled him.

 

 _Fear_.

 

Even as he got closer he could tell from the way Seifer was sitting that something heavy was burdening him. Squall bit his bottom lip, concerned and thinking back to how Seifer had initially reacted to the idea of going out to help Matron. _I wonder if it didn't go well..._ He walked up to where the other was sitting,

 

“Hey.” Seifer gazed down at his feet.

 

“...hey.” The silence felt heavy. Squall sat down beside the other gunblader.

 

“...are you alright?”

 

“.....”

 

 

Squall wasn't used to being on the receiving end of silence as much as being the one keeping it. Seifer appeared to be gripping Hyperion's hilt tightly in an effort not to fidget. However, when he finally spoke up his voice, although quiet, was solid.

 

“Squall.” He turned to gaze into Squall's eyes. “...you trust me, right? More than others...” Squall gazed back, nodding.

 

“...I do.” Seifer sighed, scratching at the back of his head with the hand not gripping Hyperion.

 

“...even after everything I did? To the others...and you?” Squall nodded.

 

“Yes.” Sighing in a way that sounded near-frustrated, Seifer stood up suddenly, taking a few steps forward and gazing out at the waves and away from a puzzled Squall.

 

“You...would never force me to be something I'm not. Never force me to...do something I would regret.” It wasn't a question, yet the hesitation was setting off alarm bells in Squall's head.

 

“Seifer...” When Seifer turned to gaze at him, his eyes were dark. Haunted. “Of course I wouldn't.” Squall got to his feet, feeling a little shaky.

 

 

“Seifer-- you don't need to do this.” Seifer stepped closer to him and Squall's eyes were drawn to the scar on his face.

 

“Yes. I do.” Squall shook his head.

 

“You don't have to--”

 

“I want to.” Squall swallowed, his throat dry as Seifer took another step forward so that they were only a step apart. “Back when I asked you why... _how long_ you'd had feelings for me...you said 'the world didn't seem right' without me in it. Well, I feel the same way. I _know_ you Squall-- I know how strong you are-- what you're capable of. We're on equal ground, you and I. But...” Seifer winced. “I've seen the terrible things magic is capable of. Lived it. You're strong but _you're not strong enough_. Not on your own.”

 

“Seifer...” Seifer gazed straight into his eyes.

 

“That's why it has to be me, Squall. Needs to be.”

 

Unsheathing Hyperion, Seifer shoved the precious gunblade into the sand between them and crouching down, kneeled, gazing up at Squall and bearing his soul to someone for the second time in his life.

 

“Squall. Let me be your Knight.”

 

 

Seconds of silence stretched out as Squall finally managed to get his body to move and kneeled down in front of Seifer, searching his eyes, his right hand reaching out to touch the left side of Seifer's face, his thumb tracing the scar he'd given the other man so many years ago. The words came out quiet among the sound of the crashing waves.

 

“...you're sure about this?” Seifer held the gaze.

 

“I'm sure.” Still touching the scar, Squall leaned forward, pressing his mouth to Seifer's heatedly, gasping as he felt a chill shoot through his veins, spreading through his body into the hand tracing Seifer's scar. In less than ten seconds it had passed, and pulling back he gazed at Seifer in concern as the two of them tried to catch their breath.

 

“Are you okay?” Although Seifer nodded, Squall could see him shivering visibly. Behind them, the sun had finally disappeared on the horizon. Standing up, Squall reached a hand down to help Seifer up.

 

“...come on. Let's head back to the Orphanage. Food and a warm bed sounds good right now.” Seifer chuckled, and Squall nearly fell over at the faint smile on his rival's face.

 

“Yeah.”

 

 

 

 

By the time they opened the front door the fog had rolled in. As they took off their shoes, Cid came down the stairs, smiling.

 

 

“Squall-- always good to see you.” Squall nodded at him.

 

“Sir.” Cid sighed.

 

“...formal as always...” Seifer snickered. Matron poked her head around the corner.

 

“Dinner is ready you three.”

 

Dinner was a cheerful enough affair. Cid told Squall about the fence they'd built and Matron updated Squall on the plans for further refurbishing. Seifer was quiet through most of it, and Squall occasionally glanced over at him in concern. When dinner was over Cid retreated upstairs and Squall went to work on the dishes, leaving Matron and Seifer at the table.

 

“...are you alright dear?” Seifer sighed. _...how do I even word this?_

 

“I...uh. From before...we...”

 

“He's my Knight now.” Squall said evenly, walking over to where they were sitting and placed a hand on Seifer's head, running his fingers through his hair gently. Seifer looked up at Squall, trying his best to ignore the heated feeling on his face. The gentle, small smile the other had looking down at him nearly knocked the air out of Seifer's lungs. Matron beamed.

 

“That's wonderful!” Standing up, she walked over and placed a hand on Seifer's shoulder, looking him in the eyes. “...I'm proud of you.” Patting his shoulder, she turned her gaze to Squall. “We'll start training early tomorrow morning then. Don't stay up too late.” Bending down, she kissed them both goodnight and walking upstairs, disappeared from sight.

 

 

Seifer let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. He turned to gaze at Squall who was smirking at him.

 

“...I don't think I've ever seen you so flustered.” Seifer rolled his eyes, standing up.

 

“Shut up Squall.” Stretching, he couldn't stop the yawn escaping him. Squall's smirk turned into concern as he placed a hand on Seifer's forehead, as if checking his temperature.

 

“...are you feeling okay?” Seifer nodded.

 

“...a little dizzy and a whole lot tired, but otherwise I'm fine.” Squall nodded back.

 

“Good. Go ahead and head up. I'm just going to finish up these dishes.”

 

 

 

 

 

When Squall opened the door to their room Seifer was already lying on one of the beds, stretched out with his arms behind his head and wearing nothing but sweatpants. Smirking at him, his rival said,

 

“So, do we get to consummate our new relationship?” Squall snorted.

 

“We didn't get _married_ Seifer.” Seifer shrugged.

 

“...we pretty much vowed to protect each other and share each other's burdens. What's the difference?”

 

Squall shook his head, though he did admit mentally that the other man had a point.

 

“...we are _not_ having sex in the same house Matron and Cid are sleeping in.” Seifer raised an eyebrow.

 

“...you didn't say no to the idea of sex though.” Squall rolled his eyes.

 

“Obviously. Were you expecting me to?” Walking over, Squall motioned for Seifer to scoot over so he could lay next to him.

 

“...I honestly didn't know how you'd react to the idea.” Squall yawned and pulled the covers over both of them, curling up against Seifer's side, stretching an arm around him. Seifer gazed down at him, eyebrow raised. “...didn't think you were a cuddler either.”

 

“Seems like you had a lot of false expectations of me then. Go to sleep, Seifer.” Seifer chuckled, wrapping his arms around Squall.

 

“...alright. Goodnight Squally.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has two different feels to it. The first half is chopped up, short scenes just to give a glimpse of how Seifer's time is spent and how he reacts to it. Personally, I wanted to emphasize how Seifer, who spent the majority of the first part of his life destroying, now gets such joy and fulfillment from building and creating something stable.  
> The second half of the chapter is mostly dialogue scenes naturally. He and Edea talk through the torture Seifer was put through at the hands of Ultimecia who had been in the body of Edea at the time. Edea explains what the Sorcceress-Knight bond really is and why it's so dire that Squall has a Knight and why it has to be Seifer. 
> 
> This is the point in the story where I'm really going to start taking creative license. One of the things I love about FF8 compared to other FFs is that the world lore and mechanics are pretty dang vague, which leaves a lot of open room. 
> 
> Let's see...other things to mention... It was really hard for me to write a Seifer who's so broken down he's openly sobbing. I hope it doesn't come across as too OOC given the context of the story so far. After all, he's been holding in a lot of pain. It was going to come out eventually.
> 
> I really love the role-reversal I've got going with Seifer and Squall. In FF8 we see a confident, foolish Seifer and a Squall who struggles with having confidence and is prone to over-thinking. Now we have a Seifer who lacks confidence and gets stuck in his thoughts and a bold, solid Squall for him to lean on. 
> 
> Then of course there's the way this chapter ended. Are Squall and Seifer going to bang? Most definitely. Will this fic stroll into smut territory? I'm undecided on it for now.
> 
> There's one more chapter for this current arc-- the training sessions. After that, the plot will be moving forward.
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy~


End file.
